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Dear DadBy Nita K.
Curry Dear
Dad, I
know you will never read this, but I am just pretending.
Pretending that you are still here providing me with the love and support
that was always so much a part of our relationship.
I am pretending that I can still come with Mom and meet you for lunch
like we did when I was young. I am
pretending that whenever I feel down or just plain sick, you make a quick trip
home at lunch to bring me chocolate ice cream to cheer me up.
I am pretending that I am looking into your beautiful blue eyes and
singing “Let me call you sweetheart” like I did as a Girl Scout.
I am pretending that you will be coming to visit me soon and so
graciously offering to build a little clubhouse for your newest grandson,
similar to the playhouse you built for me when I was little.
I can’t help but pretend that your arms are around
me from time to time, giving me your strength and love that I still long for.
I am pretending that I can see you and Mom catching a long sweet kiss
between responsibilities at home. I
am pretending that you are there watching me whenever I do something for which I
want you to be proud of me. Yes, so much of this I am pretending that I am
feeling or seeing, but so much of what you left is still here in my heart and
mind. I don’t have to pretend
that you raised three boys to be fine husbands and dads. I don’t have to pretend that you are there when I see the
love and tenderness they show their wives¾because
they have become you. I don’t have to pretend you are here when one of them
gently teases me the way you always used to do. I don’t have to pretend I am singing “Let me call
you Sweetheart” into your beautiful blue eyes, because I sing the same song to
my little guy as I look into his blue eyes identical to yours. I don’t have to
pretend that you are there with your strong arms holding and comforting me,
because I now have a husband who loves me the way you loved mom.
I miss you so dad, but thank you for giving me so
much love, wisdom, and strength. Even
when you were sick, we all came to you for advice and in your quite gentle way,
you would give us the answers without actually telling us.
I wish men today could somehow emulate the type of
man you were, you were strong and
manly, but also you knew the wisdom of gentleness and love. You never shied away from this kind-hearted side and people
were constantly seeking your advice because of it.
It’s funny that even though you are no longer with
me, I pretend sometimes you are. I hope I make you proud of me. Forever
your little girl,
Things I Learned from my DadBy Sharenda Holland Barlar If
my father taught me anything, it was to live for the day and to not be afraid to
try something new. My parents used
to be missionaries, so in a sense our life was already an adventure.
He was never afraid to try something new: whether it was a strange
looking dish or a road we had never traveled.
We rarely ever took the same road home because Dad was always trying to
find a shortcut. Because of his
adventurous spirit, we discovered hidden treasures wherever we went.
Also,
my dad always seemed to find a way to get into different performances without
paying for them. Don’t get me
wrong, he didn’t sneak in. He
just conveniently met someone that let us in.
The Harlem Globetrotters came into town when I was young and I wanted to
see them. The tickets were extremely expensive because this was
overseas and they were an American team. Somehow,
my dad scored free courtside tickets and backstage passes to meet all of the
players! When I started developing an interest in music and
art, he took advantage of the opportunity to expose me to cultural matters.
For example, I remember when I was about fourteen, my dad took me to see
the opera La Traviatta. Of
course, somehow we got in free and we got to meet all of the performers.
That was the most incredible experience!
Later on, whenever we would travel, my father would
always make sure we saw the museums or historical sites, and not just the
churches we would be attending. Some
people might think that this is trivial, but now as a professor, I see how
educating these experiences were for me. It
seems like life has come full circle for me this year because, coincidentally,
I’m writing this article from Spain and my father is with me.
We have spent three weeks in several parts of the country looking at
buildings and architecture that are older than the United States. We spent over three hours in museums commenting on the use of
color in the paintings and their various periods. We’ve hiked from the top of Gibraltar to the subways of
Madrid getting to know the people and the culture.
I know that my dad has passed this adventurous spirit on to me because it
definitely didn’t come from my mom. She
stayed home! Happy Father’s Day Dad. I love you! My
Dad, My Hero
By Alicia Becton When
I was a little girl, my dad always said he knew everything there was to know. Being the strong-willed child that I was, I would play this
game where I tried to find a question he didn’t know the answer to.
He also always said “It takes a lot of money to live,” “Here’s
$5, don’t spend it all in one place,” and “Don’t react to people, let
them react to you” along with many other favorites.
My dad has always sang obscure lines of songs no one else knew and just
recently I heard one of those lines on the radio and was amazed to discover it
was actually a song. He quotes
poems and lines of poetry. Once
while watching Jeopardy! I couldn’t believe that none of the contestants could
finish the line ‘What is so rare as a day in ___’ “It’s June!
June!” I was yelling at
them. But they didn’t grow up
with Rudy Becton as a dad. His favorite poem is probably Stopping
by the Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost, which he quoted in its
entirety every time it snowed and we got out of school for the day.
He would drive our family by huge, gorgeous mansions in areas of St.
Louis and say “Yeah, but they’re not happy,” and we would laugh about it
till it hurt. I got my love for
mathematics from my dad and majored in it in college just like him.
The love of numbers, logic, and only one right answer was instilled in me
way back when he claimed to know everything. Over the past ten years or more I’ve watched my dad deal with one health problem after another: diabetes, heart trouble, and cancer just to name a few. He’s undergone quintuple-bypass surgery and now undergoes treatments for cancer. With all of this he has this amazing attitude and strength. I’ve heard him say all my life “You know, even if
we weren’t Pentecostal, we’d still live the same way because it’s such a
safe way to live¾it
really is the best lifestyle”. Now
I hear him say “The faith I thought I had in God, I really do have¾I
believe it all a lot more than I thought I did”. When
my faith was shaken because of my dad’s health, his became stronger.
You know what? Maybe my dad
does know everything after all! Happy Father’s Day, Daddy. I love you¾you’re
my hero. ninetyandnine.com ©
2000, Nita K. Curry, Sharenda Barler, Alicia Becton |
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