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The Art of Appreciation
By Alicia Becton In most any job you learn early on that your boss will be
quick to point out a mistake you’ve made or something you should have done
better. But just noticing the things done correctly, or above and beyond what
was necessary, is rarely noticed. The ability to reward the positive goes a long
way. We recently had a special speaker in our Sunday School
class that basically taught a short seminar on complimenting people, sending
cards, saying hello to people we rarely talk to just because. She concluded the
lesson with note cards for us to pick out and mail one to either a friend or
family member that week to just say we were thinking about them. This was the
Sunday before the anniversary of September 11. It made me realize that we take a
lot of important relationships for granted without ever doing something extra to
make the other person feel special. It was also reiterated to me how seldom I go
out of my way for someone I barely know. I think it’s fair to say that most anyone involved in
church ministry knows they will not be noticed for all the time, energy, money
they expend in said ministry. This is okay because it is understood that God
notices all and while we may not be overwhelmed with appreciation, we give of
ourselves to a ministry we believe in that not only makes a difference for those
we minister to, but for us as well. Having said this, I have learned a lesson
that I am trying to apply to various relationships. I do not need to feel
appreciated to be involved in ministry. As is the unwritten rule, that probably
won’t happen, so it works out. I do not, however, want to feel unappreciated.
I’m not sure where the line gets crossed, but when it happens, it’s pretty
clear. I can offer no solution to this issue, but can only look for ways to make
people important to me feel appreciated rather than unappreciated. Acts 28:10 says, “Who also honoured us with many
honours; and when we departed, they laded us with such things as were
necessary.” Luke is referring to the shipwreck incident when Paul
withstood a poisonous snakebite and ended up ministering to the islanders and
many were healed. That would be an easy one to show some appreciation. Plus,
Paul happens to be my Bible hero. But how many times did he feel unappreciated?
He did write, “For Demas hath forsaken me, having loved this present world,
and is departed unto Thessalonica; Crescens to Galatia, Titus unto Dalmathia.
Only Luke is with me… (II Timothy 4:10-11). There are certain things one can do in a dating
relationship to insure the other party feels special: flowers, cards, phone
calls are easy ones for guys to give girls, for example. If new girlfriend knows
that previous girlfriend received flowers and new girlfriend never receives any,
chances are great that new girlfriend won’t feel all that special (just some
free female insight). With friends it’s so easy to take them for granted when
a quick e-mail to let them know you’re thinking about them may make their day.
Family: Call them for a change. The point is: There are easy answers to
guarantee those important to you don’t feel unappreciated even if they don’t
always feel all that appreciated. Romans 1:21, II Timothy 3:2-4 and other scriptures mention the danger of being unthankful in general and unthankful to God specifically. He doesn’t like to feel unappreciated and there are several options for showing Him appreciation and being thankful. It’s a conscious effort to improve in this area. ninetyandnine.com © 2002, Alicia Becton ------ Alicia Becton is the managing editor of ninetyandnine.com.
One of her many talents is organizing birthday dinners for her group of
friends.
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