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Print Dear Gabby, I was raised in the United Pentecostal Church and have much love and respect for its strengths and an understanding for some of its weaknesses. As I got older, I began to research many of the holiness “standards” of dress that I had been taught growing up. I developed a stronger conviction for the standards I believed to be soundly based in biblical principles and, at the same time, I developed a strong desire to release those rules I realized were not based in the Bible, but rather on men's preferences. My issue is this—I still want to be of service to the Lord within this organization. Is it enough that I do all these standards, even if I disagree with some of them in my heart? Wanting to Let Go in Louisiana
Dear Miss Louisiana, Curfew laws for youth are fairly common now in the United States, but when I was a young lady, no one had ever heard of them. That is, until the night my snide little sister Susannah snuck out of our house to meet that breathtakingly handsome (and bad boy) Buddy Cooper. I don’t have the time to get into that whole story right now, but Susannah ended up with a broken leg and a damaged reputation, and Buddy ended up dead. Our town council felt that they had to “do something” after that to prevent a similar incident, and when they emerged from their long meeting, they’d created a youth curfew of 10 p.m. in our town (unless the young folks were accompanied by their parents or another responsible adult.) Many of my young friends were angry with the new law, especially since they hadn’t done anything wrong (or at least, they hadn’t gotten caught when they did). I, personally, was really happy about the new law because my wise Papa had always had a standing Walker household rule that every member of his own family was to be indoors by 9 p.m. With the new town rule, I was getting an extra hour to be out with my friends! My Papa soon set me straight¾the very first night I was still outside on the porch swing (with my beau at the time, Frederick VonDenkkerguski,) at half past nine at night. “Gabrigail!” Papa’s voice sounded stern as the door squeaked open. My heart stopped for a moment, hearing that tone coming from him. “Yes, Papa?” I answered, stopping the swing with my foot and looking at Frederick in alarm. “It’s half past nine o’clock.” “Yes, Papa, I know,” I answered, wondering what I’d done. “What makes you think you can break the household rules?” he asked, and then continued. “In the Walker household, we’re indoors and our company is gone by 9 p.m.” “But, but,” I stammered, watching Frederick stand up, “the new town curfew…” “…has nothing to do with our family” he finished my sentence for me. “It’s my responsibility before God to lead my family in the way that I feel makes the most sense. If the law sets the standard lower than I do, well, it’s not the town that has the responsibility for your safety and well-being. It’s me. Now say goodnight to Mr. VonDenkkerguski and come in.” And that’s exactly what I did. I didn’t see what all the fuss was about, and I didn’t see any problem with staying out on the porch swing with Frederick until 10 p.m., but I knew that my dad was the head of our home and it was my responsibility to obey him. When I look back on that instance, from the wisdom of all the years I’ve lived, I can see things clearer. (And my memory is much clearer than my eyesight at this advanced age!) I still don’t believe that there’s anything particularly evil about a specific hour, but I do believe that my father loved me and wanted the best for me. If his rules were a bit stricter than the rest of the world’s, what harm came to me if I obeyed them? I was safer than everyone else, and less likely to experience any trouble that might have come to someone during those outlawed hours. You could probably learn something from the way my beloved father led his family. If your pastor or the church organization sets up guidelines that are a bit stricter than just what’s set out in the Bible, what harm is there in obedience? God gave your pastor (a person just like you) the responsibility for watching for your soul. I don’t believe the guidelines are set up to make everyone miserable. Instead, those guidelines are created to protect you and your soul. So, to answer your specific question, God wants us to obey with joy, not with a bad attitude; however, at the very least, we should obey. It’s just more fun to do it with joy. Sincerely Sincere,
ninetyandnine.com © 2005, ninetyandnine.com
---------- Gabrigail VanBurden has been offering advice for longer than most of you have been alive. Email your practical Apostolic life questions to Gabby@ninetyandnine.com and be prepared for some straight answers |
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