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Print Dear Gabby, I have been battling for the unborn for some time now. I was raised by a very liberal woman who indoctrinated me into believing that abortion was about “choice.” Once I received the Holy Ghost I realized that I had been lied to. My problem is that no one seems to care. I have prayed for the souls of those who refuse to accept that a child is being killed and have even prayed for those who perform the abortions that their hearts will be changed but I am not seeing results. I know I cannot demand that God works on my time but every day 4,000 more children are dying. I have arranged to begin volunteering at a Crisis Pregnancy Center but I want to do more. I believe it is my calling to help end this atrocity. Gabby my question is this- How can I reach those whose hearts have been seared? I am convinced that the killing will not stop until the hearts of the nation and the world are changed. I need your help and your prayers! Agonizing about Abortion in Atlanta Dear Ms. Atlanta, The recent destruction of Hurricane Katrina really saddened me. So many people lost their homes, their churches, their jobs, their pets and many, even their lives. I wanted to help but what can a fairly healthy, 100 year-old woman who lives in a retirement community do? At first, I felt helpless. I’m at the age where people come to help me but I still felt that I had something to offer. And I discovered that I could do more than I’d originally thought. I got involved in everything my own church was doing – including the yard sale to raise funds, collecting food and clothing to fill up the truck my church drove down there, even borrowing my center’s kitchen to bake some homemade cookies to send along. I also talked to the Director of my retirement center to find out what we were doing – and I got involved in that. I offered to put in an extra bed into my personal room if there was an elderly lady who was left without a place to live. Once they realized I was serious, the Director spoke to other residents and found 10 other people willing to share their spaces. We ended up squeezing 10 more seniors into our already “full” community! That’s how I became friends with my lovely new roommate, Vernelda Williams, who, at the age of 88, is a youngster compared to me! We’ve had so much fun together, comparing our lives – hers from the Deep South and mine from the Midwest. And we’ve decided that we’re having so much fun, we’re going to continue to be roommates even though Vernelda could go back now, if she chose. Ms. Atlanta, I honor your desire to help save the lives of the unborn. I would like to suggest that you continue in all the things you’re doing, as well as constantly considering new ways to help. I believe the Lord opens doors for the willing. Just remember that He only requires each of us to do what we can do – and nothing more. Can you imagine Him wanting me (at 100 years old) to fly in a helicopter and climb down one of those ropes to rescue people? No! He did, however, require me to do what I was capable of doing. No more. No less. And I believe He was pleased with my efforts as He’s pleased with yours. Just continue to do what you can do and remember that, ultimately, the battle is the Lord’s. Sincerely Sincere, Gabby
Dear Gabby, You recently answered a relationship question ("Dealing with a Break up") and I have a question of my own relating to my relationship with my girlfriend. She broke up with me because she was feeling suffocated. This is not the first time we have broken up for this reason. The difference this time is that we live together. The thing is, a week before this incident, she told me that she wanted to marry me and spend the rest of her life with me. Now she is telling me that she is unhappy with her life and she is not sure about her feelings for me. I am so devastated. I have never been so hurt before in my life. I asked her if we could try and work things out, but she is set in her decision. She needs her time away to be happy again. In the meantime, she gets really aggravated with me and does mean things. She says she still loves me and does not want to throw our relationship away, but she just needs her time. I am skeptical because she insists on being broken up. She tells me that there is no other guy. She has me on a leash. Do you have any words of wisdom for me? Mr. Confused in California Dear Mr. California, Numbers have never been my specialty. My brother Stanley loved all forms of mathematics and thought about mathematical concepts even when he wasn’t being forced to. Not me. Mathematics was something I did because a teacher (and my Papa) forced me to. Papa believed that everyone – even girls – should have a working knowledge of arithmetic, whether they wanted to or not. I tried. Really, I did. But I couldn’t imagine why anyone would have interest in something as boring as numbers. Now, words… that’s a different story. You can actually do extraordinary things with words; things like communicate with people and tell stories and ask questions and listen and read and, oh, all kinds of interesting things. What’s so special about addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division? I’ve always had that mind-set about numbers, which is why, when I was in my fourth year of grammar school, my Papa promised to buy me three pieces of candy from the General Store if I got all the problems right on my arithmetic test one week. Of course, that would’ve meant I’d have to study – something I really didn’t want to do. The afternoon of the test, I realized that, since I hadn’t studied, I really didn’t know the concepts. Not only was I going to miss out on my three pieces of candy, I didn’t think I’d get any problems right! I knew that was going to be unacceptable to my Papa so I decided to look at Genevieve Adams’ answers and copy them onto my own paper. (Genevieve’s tests in all her subjects always came back with perfect scores on them.) So that’s what I did. I cheated. When the corrected paper came back to me with the “100%” on the top, I was thrilled – until I saw the note from my teacher on the bottom, asking me to stay after class. I’m sure you can figure out what happened. The teacher, who knew I struggled with arithmetic, knew that there was no possible way that I could’ve gotten all the questions right without cheating. She did offer to have me show her, on the chalkboard, how I figured out my answers, but, of course, I couldn’t do it. And, of course, she talked to my parents. And, of course, I didn’t get any candy. And, of course, I got a spanking and the “privilege” of cleaning the kitchen by myself for a month and the job of not only redoing the test, but working with my Papa on arithmetic at the kitchen table each night for 30 minutes, once the dishes were done. What Papa said to me that first night, when I was feeling so upset about how things had turned out is something I want to say to you, Mr. California. “Gabrigail?” He said to me in his big, stern voice. “Yes, Papa.” I answered in my quavery little girl voice, knowing he was going to impart something I’d need to remember forever. (And I have.) “You can’t do wrong and expect right results.” I didn’t understand exactly what he meant then, but, through the years, I’ve understood it better and better. He was trying to tell me that the only way I can expect right results is to follow the rules in the first place. I feel sad for you and your girlfriend but I’m not at all surprised by how things have turned out. It sounds like you two were trying to have all the rewards of marriage without actually making the lifetime commitment. God has specific guidelines and it’s important to follow His plans if you want a successful and happy relationship. Maybe it’s time to step back from this young woman, get advice from a Godly man (like my Papa), and determine to live the rest of your life God’s way. Then you can expect your relationships to be happy and fulfilling. Sincerely Sincere, Gabby
ninetyandnine.com © 2006, ninetyandnine.com ---------- Gabrigail VanBurden has been offering advice for longer than most of you have been alive. Email your practical Apostolic life questions to Gabby@ninetyandnine.com and be prepared for some straight answers! |
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