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Life After Africa: Do I Dare Return? March 31, 2008 By
Amberle Kaiser It's
true what they say about mission
trips--you do leave a part of your
heart behind, and you are never the same. Don't
get me wrong; life has been amazing since I've come home from
Africa eight months ago. My first few weeks back, I taught in an
all-night kid's prayer meeting and in a college and career class
at my home church. At the “7 Essentials” kids prayer seminar in
November, 2007, I sat on a panel with Vicki Simoneaux, missionary
to Malawi, Zimbabwe, and Mozambique (talk about butterflies!).
My life
has changed! I went from this horribly shy girl to one who can step
up and teach. Yes, I still get nervous (okay, really nervous), but
at least now I'm willing to try. Unbelievable Spiritual Highs In September,
I attended my first General Conference. My friend, Colleen, got
appointed as a full-time missionary to Ghana. Friday night during
the Foreign Missions service, I carried a flag. I marched in with
all the deputizing missionaries in a huge procession. I was walking
on the clouds. I had arrived. I led a group of young people that
had been on the trip to Ghana with me. We walked smack in the middle
of Brother and Sister Blake (retired missionaries) and the newly-appointed
AIMers to Singapore. I sat with the other AIMers and went crazy,
as one by one, 14 missionary families found out deputation was over.
They would be going back to the field early, fully funded.
Then
came the altar call. “Any one who feels the call…” I didn't
need to be pushed. I made my way to the front of the stadium and
hit my knees. Time stood still and tears fell down my face. Memories
of hungry children, orphans at the orphanage, Prince, the young
man who sat outside our hotel everyday, Sandra, the four-year-old
who smiled every time we rounded the corner to walk to the grocery
store, all flooded my mind. Then there was Simon, the man I was
blessed to baptize. The feeling of stepping off the plane in Africa
knowing I was in the will of God. Or the fear of my mom hugging
me goodbye and not really knowing what was to come. I heard Colleen's
voice beside me, and we prayed together. I have no clue how long
I prayed. I do know that when I stood my mind was made up--God had
called me to Africa, and I was going back! Bitter Reality On a
bit of a down side, it was a rough transition back home. Most of
it was probably in my head. At first, I was center of attention,
which in itself was weird. All my friends welcomed me home (my mom
and roommate met me on the outside of security--the Mountain Dew
they brought for me tasted so good!). I was exhausted, and felt
out of place. It was 5 p.m. in St. Louis, but it felt like 10 o'clock
at night for me. Not to mention I had spent 31 hours in transit.
I spent the night at my mom's, and they had a blast keeping
me awake. I spent a week or so at Headquarters and everyone came
by to see the little missionary. I struggled to adjust back to my
normal schedule. I was pretty crabby at first. I found it difficult
to sit still in church. (I guess that is actually a good thing.)
I made myself believe no one understood how I felt. It's
been eight months now, and I have grown leaps and bounds. I am helping
teach Sunday school at my home church, and even taught at our Regional
Prayer summit. Not a day goes by that I don't think of Africa.
I know in my heart that I will be back there full-time some day.
God has called me to missions. Hidden Calling? I've
taken a lot of time telling you all this because I know there are
more missionaries out there, but you are scared. I promise you I
was/am, too. There were more questions in my mind than answers the
day my plane left for Africa. I cried part of the way, and cried
some nights while I was there. It's not a cake walk. However,
my mom told me, “God doesn't call the qualified; He qualifies
who He chooses to call.” We just have to step outside our world
and realize there are so many opportunities out there. I challenge
anyone who has had the thought, “Just maybe God is calling me .
. .” This year's Next Steps trip is to the Dominican Republic.
The budget is $4,500, and there's plenty of time to apply.
I've
made a believer out of my roommate, so she's going. Apply, pray,
but most importantly--go! You won't regret it, and, better than
that, you'll change the world. © 2008,
Amberle Kaiser ---------- Amberle Kaiser is currently a nursing student and Sunday school teacher. She works as a nanny raising money to go back to Africa. In her free time she loves reading and thinking of new ways to teach kids to pray. |
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