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Being Somebody's Son October 13, 2008 By Tom Velie Dear Dad, The little boy
sat in the group of temporary friends earlier this year. The
children's counselor asked each of them, “If you could be anything
you wanted to be, what would it be?” He thought for only a
moment before responding, “I'd like to be somebody's son.” “Just to be
somebody's son?” I asked myself, allowing the pointed knife of these
innocent words to slowly penetrate my heart. The hundred or
so adoption workers who were listening to the counselor, a former
Miss Nevada--an adopted child herself--blurred as the emotional
wave tumbled over me. I always knew
what I wanted to be. Well, perhaps my dreams changed a few
times between kindergarten and graduation. Yes, I vacillated
between wanting to be a carpenter, the President of the United States,
an astronaut, a math teacher, a railroad engineer, a cowboy, a preacher
and, most often back then, an Air Force pilot. Not one millisecond
of my brain-time was spent pondering the silly-to-me thought of
being “a son.” Doesn't everyone
have a father? Jesus, who Isaiah called “a man of sorrow,”
was the Father's son, Joseph's son, and David's son. I am
“Bill Velie's son” and you certainly acquainted Joe and me with
the 38 Proverbial instructions to sons. You also taught us
how to hunt, fish, mow the lawn, wash the car, shovel snow (why
didn't we own a snow blower back then?), dig weeds, rake the lawn,
build homes, finish concrete, and wash dishes. You seem to
have mentioned “variety,” while rarely mentioning “allowance.”
Perhaps it's
because you've been diagnosed with a brain tumor. Perhaps
it's because our mission in life is finding “forever families” for
children through adoption. But, in that one brief point of time,
and with a mental picture of one little boy saying, “I'd like to
be somebody's son,” the emotional knife found its mark. A multitude
of thoughts tumbled within me. The memories of the good times
and tough times we've had poured through my mind as the tears forced
themselves from my eyes. In that moment, I realized that “being
a son” eclipses all of the other dreams and hopes of a lifetime.
In a way that the world's system fails to comprehend, I am a wealthy
man because I am your son. “Being a son”
means that you do have a father. And you're the very
best! Thank you, Dad. Love, Tom © 2008, Tom
Velie Tom Velie (LMSW) serves as the Executive Director of New Beginnings International Children's & Family Services.
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