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February 23, 2004
Essential
Family Resources - Travis Miller
One Home at a Time
by Dennis Rainey (Focus on the Family)
Rainey is the director of Family Life, a family ministry
under the umbrella of Campus Crusade for Christ. Generally, this book challenges
couples and parents to consider the values that direct their homes.
Specifically, Rainey maintains the need for a Family Reformation in our culture.
He intones that such a reformation involves knowing, applying, experiencing,
embracing, and proclaiming God’s truth about marriage and family. He teaches
that such a reformation will take place when families will build their homes on
four pillars: 1. Personal Repentance and Purity; 2. The Sacred Covenant of
Marriage; 3. The Sanctity of God-Ordained Roles; 4. A Legacy of Spiritual
Vitality for the Next Generation. This book burrows to the core and will cause
you to seriously consider how you are building your home. More information:
www.familylife-ccc.org
His Needs, Her Needs
by Willard F. Harley, Jr. (Fleming H. Revell)
After a number of years as a practicing marriage counselor,
Harley, a clinical psychologist, began to investigate the reasons that people
fall into affairs. From his personal research, he believes that there are
certain needs that must be met in every relationship. Generally, he discusses
five needs that are specific to men and five needs that are unique to women.
While there are many great books available for couples, I am convinced that
among those in my library, this is one of the best.
She Calls Me Daddy
by Robert Wolgemuth (Focus on the Family Publishing)
This was the first book that I read regarding the special
relationship between father and daughter. It impacted me in a profound way. The
real meat of the book is contained in the second part entitled “Never Too Tough,
Never Too Tender—Seven Things You Must Know.” The seven chapters that follow
cover Protection, Conversation, Affection, Discipline, Laughter, Faith, and
Conduct. Wolgemuth is a writer that catches your attention easily and then
maintains it with that same ease. If you have been blessed with a daughter, you
owe it to her to read this book. In fact, after perusing it again for this
article, I think I’m going to read it another time soon.
What a Difference a Daddy Makes
by Dr. Kevin Leman (Thomas Nelson Publishing)
While not the first book I read about dads and daughters, it
also ranks as one of the best. Leman’s style of writing is educational without
seeming academic. While also including a meaty second section with similarities
to Wolgemuth’s book, it’s Leman’s first sixty pages or so that I found most
impacting. Here he clearly and profoundly makes his case for the utmost
importance of a father in his daughter’s life. After finishing this book, I
passed it on to my wife so that she could keep me accountable for the things it
emphasizes. More information:
www.drleman.com
Raising a Modern-Day Knight
by Robert Lewis (Tyndale House Publishers)
Though I have this book in my library, I must confess that I
have not read it cover to cover. Understandably, since we’ve not enjoyed a son
in our home, our motivation is not as high to finish this text. Yet, since I
have recommended two books concerning daughters, I didn’t want to leave out
those who have sons. This book is my nod to you.
Parenting Young Children
by Don Dinkmeyer, Gary McKay, & James Dinkmeyer (American Guidance Service)
This is one of a series written by these authors. While these
books focus specifically on certain age groups of children, each of them is
based on the same parenting system. The authors teach Systematic Training for
Effective Parenting (S.T.E.P.). The text begins by informing the reader
concerning typical developmental processes of children: physically, mentally,
and behaviorally. From this understanding, readers learn about building
self-esteem, communication, and cooperation skills into a child’s life. An
entire chapter is devoted to explaining effective discipline techniques.
Finally, parents are encouraged to nurture emotional and social development.
This book presents an incredibly well-reasoned program that will bring results
almost immediately.
Assertive Discipline
by Lee Canter & Marlene Canter (Lee Canter & Assoc.)
Though actually written for schoolteachers to assist them
with classroom management, the concepts presented are easily extrapolated to
parents. Especially if you were raised in a home that depended almost solely on
corporal correction, this book will give you a number of much-needed alternative
methods to direct your child’s behavior. Canter’s methods are positive and
proven. You’ll not be disappointed you read this book. More information:
www.canter.net
For those of you more driven by cyber-text or likely to be in search of ready snippets of assistance, the following additional web sites offer some thoughtful material that you may find helpful:
ninetyandnine.com
© 2004, Travis Miller
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For nearly 18 years, Travis Miller has been lucky enough to be married to Becky. His prayer is that his luck never runs out. Together, the Millers have been blessed with two fabulous daughters who are both enjoying their youth-group years. When not swamped with family maintenance or Kingdom ministry, Travis can be found logging miles on his Trek, or shopping for that elusive new Cannondale.