May 31, 2004 - Learning the Hard Way

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Learning the Hard Way
By M.B. Barkley
May 31, 2004

Fresh out of high school and accepted by my first college choice, I had no clue what was to come next. I soon found out that college was a learning experience, including meeting new people who become your closest friends. You somehow trust them.

One thing I learned my first semester was to manage my time. I ended up being stressed out, which eventually led me to the Emergency Room, for my first of many anxiety attacks. Take my word for it—it’s not a fun feeling to be stuck in a hospital having an EKG done on you.

In my second semester at college, I began to drift away from God. I prioritized all right, but I put priority on the wrong things. I hung out with friends from college more than anyone else. I wanted to be liked and accepted, which isn’t just a girl-thing. I had to find out the hard way that being accepted by God should be the most important thing in my life. If you stick with God, He’ll help you through everything in college. I had heard it before, but I guess I never really learned that lesson.

When You Play with Sin, You Get Burned.
I wasn’t ready for what happened next. When you play with sin, you do get burned. I trusted people I didn’t know very well. I never thought that what happened next would have happened to a person who was in church.

I always seemed to have guy friends, especially at college, and I trusted one guy at college too much. I thought that everything was cool between us. Friends—that was all we were supposed to be. However, he wanted more. I didn’t want to give it to him; after all we were friends. He forced a French kiss on me that chilled me to the bone. Other things happened that made me feel violated. I wanted to go home and take a shower right away. I felt so disgusting. I trusted him and he took advantage of that trust.

I blamed myself for everything. My self-esteem was at an all-time low. Talking to the pastor helped, but I realized that if I had kept my life aligned with God this would have never happened. I grew from that experience and now trust God more than ever, knowing that His will is the best for my life and I don’t need to stray.

My Best Advice
The best advice I could ever give to a college student is to stay close to God. You never expect the new things that can happen to you at college. A big thing is that people watch you every day. It always seems to be the people you least expect.

When I went through all my problems in the four years of college, people watched to see how I reacted to different things. Whenever they had a problem, they came to me with it and wanted me to pray with them. It is always important to be prayed up and be an example to others so that they know they have hope for the next day.

Give your best to God and don’t wait until the semester is over to get involved with the things of God. Doing as much as you can for God can keep you from falling into temptations that you never thought you would give in to.

ninetyandnine.com

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M. B. Barkley just graduated in May, 2004 with a Bachelors of Arts in Psychology from California University of Pennsylvania. She is also an active member of Calvary Apostolic Church in Pennsylvania. When she is not bugging people in her spare time, she loves to shop and listen to music.