Beauty Tips For Women Who Don't Wear Make-Up
[Editor's Note: The April Fool's photo essay promised for today's entry will be postponed until later in the week, or whenever Blonde Moment gets around to sending us the pictures.]
Whenever I attend large A/P conferences and gatherings, I am always struck by the fact that our organizations enjoy a high percentage of naturally beautiful women. I am not one of those women.
Thus, I am always frustrated to hear my guy friends exclaim, “There’s never any girls at this thing!” when seated down the aisle from us are whole rows of beautiful young ladies, none of whom I can hold a candle to. I always cringe at such remarks while nervously eyeing all the stunning blondes and wonder, “Gosh, what must I look like to these guys if they don’t find those girls attractive? Do they think I look like the ‘before’ photo in the magazine ad for The Betty Ford Center for Drug Rehabilitation or something?”
Let’s face it, girls. We all want to look our best. When we look our best, we feel better about ourselves, we have more confidence, we get that job we interviewed for, etc . . . but sometimes it’s hard to look our best. Unlike women who rely on cosmetic crutches to conceal, cover and camouflage their flaws, we definitely have our work cut out for us. Especially me. For years I sought long and hard for the best products to turn me into a beauty queen, but even though I've given up on that, I learned a few things along the way that have been very helpful to me and just may work for you too.
Get Rid of the Powder Keg
Oily complexions – the only thing good about them is that oily skin produces less wrinkles. Okay, so maybe I’ll look great when I’m fifty, but that doesn’t do me much good right now. Fortunately ladies, we no longer have to use the oily complexion shtick as an excuse to cake on the powder. Women who cake on layer after chalky layer in a losing battle to fight the shine will only attract a man who is interested in Just One Thing – Bozo the Clown, lusting over the size of your cosmetic case. So boot the Bozos and invest in several tubes of Mary Kay’s Oil Mattifier. This is the only mattifier I’ve tried that works long, hard hours for you, delivering matte skin for up to eight hours. At .6 fluid ounces, it’s my shortest best friend.
A Tuckered Pucker No More
Thin, pale lips – number one on my long list of beauty woes. Fortunately, a little peppermint oil (or its cheaper generic, cassia oil) added to your favorite lip balm will go a long way towards giving your lips some life without looking like you robbed the Clinique counter. Use those newly beautiful lips wisely, however. I don’t advocate flashing them Romeo’s way; instead, try speaking kindly to that skinny kid everyone else makes fun of.
Real-Life Rapunzels
It’s a paradox in Pentecostal circles. While we ladies have to pretty much leave our faces alone, we are discouraged from doing likewise with our hair. As long as it isn’t cut or dyed (or at least done so discreetly in some congregations), our hair is fair game for any new hair-do we can dream up. Woo-hoo! Unfortunately, this often leaves us resorting to all manner of torture devices that wind up frying our glory. In the interest of beautiful -- and healthy -- hair, I have two suggestions.
Heat damages your hair, but there’s no other way to get it dry in a hurry. Invest in a blow dryer that uses infrared heat, ceramic components and ionic particles. Whatever all that stuff means, it adds to up a much shorter drying time, which results in fewer frizzies. After you try one and fall in love, any monetary donations you send me to express your undying gratitude will go towards keeping ninetyandnine.com on the Internet. Of course, these hair dryers range from 70 – 200 dollars at retail stores, but I got my cherished Hai Hair Art dryer brand new on e-bay for only 38 bucks.
Use pink foam rollers whenever you can. They are inconvenient and uncomfortable at times, but the less you heat your hair, the healthier and shinier it will be. The curls you get from foam rollers are prettier and longer-lasting as well, and that’s saying a lot coming from this curl-challenged chick.
Even More
For some beauty tips from scripture, go here. Results guaranteed!
Got a non-make-up beauty tip or related favorite website you’d like to share with the rest of your sistahs in the Lord? E-mail it to me!
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
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