Apostolics and the Single Life: Part 3
Today's Part 3 wraps up the discussion of singles vs. marriage on my blog. However, it’s clear that similar discussions among singles, youth leaders, pastors, concerned married people and others is far from over – and thanks goodness for that! To begin, let me review what I’ve covered so far.
A Quick Review
In Part 1, I linked to Amadeus at The Theocrats and pointed out some flaws in reasoning people make in believing singles are marrying too late. The first was that studies show a decline in divorce rates among those who marry between the ages of 28 – 30. The second was that I Corinthians 7:9 seems to consider marriage as a last resort for out-of-control libidos and shouldn’t be used to encourage singles to marry before they’re ready. Third, I pointed out that the decision to marry isn’t one made alone; that some singles have no choice in their singleness and others have made the best choice for themselves in preferring to remain single.
In Part 2, I linked to Dan Edelen at Cerulean Sanctum, who did a thought-provoking job of exploring the other side of the issue; that is, why so many parents, married couples and others are concerned about singles, particularly as it relates to the pervasive problem of pre/extra-marital sex among Christians and those striving to remain pure in a “pornographic culture.” If you haven’t read Dan’s thoughts yet, I urge you to do so.
A Timely Letter
In fact, in response to what I wrote about him in Part 2, I received a letter today from Dan himself that I thought worthy of publishing:
“Thank you for referencing my post about singleness on my blog Cerulean Sanctum. I appreciate what you wrote on your blog in response. “I think that some people are better singles than others. I know that while I did not struggle with some of the sexual temptations that some singles did, there were some that were a struggle for me, particularly mentally. In an age when pornography permeates every part of our culture, it is very hard for most single men to keep from falling into that cesspool. Since I was single for a while, I heard all the stories, even from single men who were as devout as they could possibly be.
“That is why I think that it is better to marry than burn. I also know that too many Christian singles have long lists of requirements for a marriage partner and that list prolongs their search. I know that many Christian singles are constantly in 'search for a mate' mode, too. Neither the list nor the search work. We need to help singles drop both those things and let God rule. When I dropped my list and abandoned my search, that is when God brought my wife into my life.
“Still, the Church has done little in this country to help singles or prepare young people to marry. We let our young people dream ‘Hollywood ending’ dreams and this is wrong. We do not give them any tools to be a better man or woman, husband or wife. In short, we set them up for failure rather than building them up for successful relationships with someone of the opposite sex. For that we need to repent and come up with more wise ways of dealing with the sexuality of our young, unmarried people.”
A Predominant Reason: The D-Word
So why are singles seemingly so reluctant to marry? One huge reason can be summed in one word: Divorce. We’re terrified of it. One single young woman captured that fear eloquently when she wrote and said, “Our generation is the generation that got slammed with divorce. Our parents grew up in traditional homes for the most part, but the average 20-something today has seen divorce up close and personal. Who's not scared of promising in front of God and everybody ‘til death do us part’ when so many people around us – parents included – have done that and failed? How does one know that his/her attempt will be any more successful?”
I have to admit the fear of divorce is the number one reason why I’m wary of life-long commitment. I’ve seen bad marriages make savage wastelands out of countless lives. I’ve seen far too many unhappy marriages, and I know I’m not alone in my observations. To many singles, there’s a lot worse things than remaining single. Still, the fact that my generation sees so many problems with today’s divorce culture gives me hope that perhaps we will instill within our children a greater reverence for the permanency of marriage.
(For a closer look at the havoc wreaked on America by divorce, check out an excellent essay by David Wayne – a.k.a JollyBlogger – called Forgotten Factors in the Downfall of Nations: Divorce.)
Other Reasons
Higher Education. There are other reasons singles put off marriage, and while they’re not as drastic as the fear of divorce, they are no less important. Higher education is one of those reasons. Not only is it becoming more encouraged among A/Ps, it is also becoming more necessary. Yet, I can’t help but wonder sometimes: How much of our desire rooted for higher education rooted in materialism rather than necessity? (I ask that even as one working to obtain a second degree!)
In addition, I often see the issues of higher education as a chicken/egg problem, especially for young women: is she single because she must get an education first? Or is she getting an education because she’s single and can’t/doesn’t want to depend on marriage for financial security? Either way, there are no easy answers, but the college factor definitely plays a large role in the lives of many single Christians.
Marriage Education. As you can see in his letter to me, Dan points out that there is little being done to educate singles on how to prepare themselves for marriage. In the blog entry linked above, he suggests a solution: “If we set an expectation that young teens get teaching in our churches on what it means to be married, setup ‘manhood’ and ‘womanhood’ classes and restore traditional rites of passage within the church, and start setting a foundation and expectation of maturity at a younger age, we can make this possible.”
While that’s not a bad idea, it certainly raises some sticky issues. Would such classes send the message to singles that their only worth lies in one day becoming a husband/father or wife/mother? Would it prepare them for the challenges they would face should their dreams of marriage not be realized, or if God leads them down a different path?
Quality Expectations. Because so many singles are leery of divorce, we often tend to place very high standards concerning who we will date and marry. Like Dan mentions, singles often have a list that each prospect must be checked against in order to determine if a person is “right” for them or not. I have a feeling the need for such a list stems from what today’s society expects from a spouse versus what society expected from spouses twenty to fifty years ago.
In Psychological Self-Help, Clayton Tucker E. Ladd writes, "Spouses are now asked to be more than ‘good providers’ and ‘good homemakers’; they are expected to be faithful lovers, fun companions, best friends, co-parents, and wise, understanding mutual helpers. Marriage is for intimacy, not just for economic security and not just 'a good mother to my kids.'" Whew! No wonder so many singles have a list. It’s also no wonder we singles are having a hard time finding another person who fulfills all those requirements all the time in the exact ways we need them to.
So should the list be chucked? Of course, everyone has basic requirements as to what he/she must have or can't stand in a person (He must be Apostolic, he must desire to be the spiritual leader of our home; I can't stand arrogance or thoughtlessness, etc.) However, above and beyond the basics, I prefer to judge each guy on his own merits, trusting that God knows what I need better than I do.
A Few Other Things to Consider
I’d like to close with a heart-felt appeal to begin or continue discussions on this issue. In doing so, I want to share some observations I’ve come across that I hope can provide you with some reference points and aid you in an honest discussion.
All singles are different. Many singles are happily content with their lives and can't imagine living any other way. They only desire marriage when (and if) they fall in love rather than desiring marriage just for the sake of being married. On the other hand, many singles desire marriage more than they care to admit, although they don't want to be pitied for their singleness. What's right for one single isn't right for another; what works for one will not work for another. It's best to approach singles on an individual basis rather than with a mass-market attitude.
Never-been-married singles and divorced singles face different issues and struggles. Most of them don’t want to be lumped together into one large singles group. However, neither group should be overlooked, forgotten, or relegated to a "box" or certain corner of the church.
Examine the message you send with your mouth versus what your actions say. When you shut singles out of participating in certain ministries (except those that relate directly to marriage), you send the message that their state is undesirable, even as you say each person in the church is valuable. Be careful of sending conflicting messages.
Many singles are lonelier than they are willing to admit. Be aware that if the church fails or is unable to provide them with the friendship and fellowship and spiritual fulfillment they need, they will eventually look outside the church for it.
Many singles do not feel the church realizes their needs and struggles are different from the majority of the church’s congregation, much less being willing to reach out to them. See Camerin Courtney’s article, The Black Sheep of God’s Family, for a closer look at this issue.
Pre-marital counseling is not emphasized enough among Apostolics, but it’s an option many singles wish were available to them should they decide to one day tie the knot.
A lot is already being done to reach singles and help them grow and develop during this period in their lives. Singles are very grateful for all your efforts!
That wraps up this series, although if I receive a glut of commentary from you (and I hope I do!) I might do an entry publishing all of it. In the meantime, let the discussions continue!
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Apostolics and the Single Life: Part 2
Today I’m still eating the leftovers from Monday’s barbeque, so pull up a chair and stay awhile because there’s still plenty of beef to go around. Before I continue picking a bone with you, I thought I'd take a moment to clean up a little mess I made in Part 1, where I referred to marriage as a last resort.
Is Marriage a Last Resort?
Obviously, there are good reasons to get married (you’re in love, you’re committed, you have a washer and dryer) and bad reasons to get married (you’re infatuated, you can’t keep your hands off each other, you have nothing but a washer and a dryer). I believe in I Corinthians 7:9 Paul is actually referring to a bad reason people get married. Perhaps a good paraphrase of that verse would be, “If you choose not to restrain your passion, then it would be better for you to get married rather than stay single and sin.” Obviously, for a couple in that situation, the ideal would be for them to restrain themselves and wait until they could marry for good reasons; however, if they can’t, marriage would be the only option for them. Therefore, to use this scripture to encourage others to marry is to use it out of context, as I believe Amadeus did in the comments I referenced in my last entry.
Otherwise, I believe marriage to be a beautiful union instituted by God as part of His plan for humanity. God formed us to find fulfillment in our relationships with Him, His people, and eventually, our spouses, so marriage is a gift to be desired when God deems the timing right. I hope that clears up any confusion you might have had about what I meant!
Those Who Would Disagree
While I view Paul’s injunctions to those who would marry in I Corinthians 7:9 on a case by case basis, Dan Edelen at Cerulean Sanctum paints his views with a much broader brush (thanks to Chad at Plaidberry for the link):
“The expectation that a young person will wade through the sexual minefield of college, then spend several years as a single while building up a career, is an increasing difficult burden for unmarried Christians struggling in our pornographic culture. The apostle Paul said that it is better to marry than to burn, yet we expect young Christians to spend almost ten years (on average today) on fire before they finally settle down. Is it any wonder that they fail in this, or that sexually transmitted diseases afflict half the people in this country--and almost as many in the Christian community? Who would wish that on their child?”
Dan’s words – indeed, his entire blog entry – threw me for a loop.
Let Me Back Up For a Minute
I intended to finish up Part 2 by talking about singleness as a gift and not denigrating its value by pushing marriage too young. Then I planned on asking those marriage pushers not to use their rather substantial influence on young people to influence them into making a bad decision or marrying too soon.
However, Dan’s words (unlike Amadeus’ of the previous post’s) forced me look hard at the point of view of someone who believes young adults should marry at a younger age. Keep in mind that Dan's speaking from a mainstream perspective, where most Christians marry closer to the national average age of marriage, rather than an A/P perspective, where some people still think it’s fine and dandy to marry a month after high school graduation. (My apologies to my sweet sister, who did just that! My sis will know what I'm trying to say here, though.) Dan has some good points about the problems of singles waiting to marry. And although I don’t like admitting my opinion on this subject isn’t the be-all and end-all, he does have legitimate concerns. So, you who feel the need to for singles to marry, I understand now a little more where you’re coming from.
Marriage? Thanks, But No Thanks!
While Dan writes to singles who desire marriage and married couples who desire marriage for singles, the fact remains that many singles don't desire to marry. As one man wrote me: “I'm perfectly content where I'm at. And, maybe, just maybe, some folks don't want to be married with two kids living in a house in suburbia by age 25. Welcome to the 21st Century people.”
Chantell of Where You Can Find Me echoes those feelings of contentment in this blog entry:
“I was comparing the times when my brain was consumed with thoughts of someone as opposed to the times when it wasn't. It seemed that I was always better off when it wasn't . . . Anyway, I think I'm coming to more fully accept and appreciate my season of singleness. The fact that there seemed to be no prospects in sight used to be a complaint, but now I'm beginning to see it as a good thing for right now.”
While I'm sure there's many singles out there itching to marry, most single friends of mine seem to be just fine with their singleness. In fact, many of them wrote to me in response to my last entry with a hearty, “Amen! Tell those married folks we don’t want their pity!”
And me, I’m right in the middle: “Yes, marriage sounds like a nice idea one day, but . . .”
So why do many singles not want to get married? Why are we fine with staying single? Looks like there’s gonna have to be a Part 3 . . .
In the meantime, if you have thoughts to share on the subject, don’t hold back! Share your thoughts with me, and I'll do my best to incorporate your perspectives into Part 3.
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Apostolics and the Single Life: Part 1
Today I’m dragging out the shish kabob sticks and the barbeque because I figure it’s time to skewer and roast an archaic notion that’s still hanging around in the darker corners of our ranks. The idea for today’s blog entry came several months ago when I received the following in an e-mail:
“Wendy!! Don't get me started on this, but the pressure is on for Apostolics (us guys included) to be married before we're old enough to buy alcohol!”
Odd. I had figured that with the majority of the Apostolic church fully dwelling within the 21st century, the 1950s notion that singles should marry as young as possible had all but disappeared. However, like old cobwebs, this idea still seems to be lingering. It isn’t just limited to Apostolics though, as this entry from the blog The Theocrats proves.
In the entry, Amadeus says the solution to the pervasive problem of pre-marital sex among young adults is to push them to mature faster and marry younger. While he brings up some good points, he makes the same mistakes in reasoning that many make in thinking singles should marry young.
The Older, the Better
The first mistake often made by people who think marriage at a young age is best is ignoring the hard facts: the younger a person marries, the higher his/her their chances for divorce. According to Dr. Neil Clark Warren, clinical psychologist and author of many books about dating and marriage, the divorce rate for 21-22 years olds is twice as high than that of 24-25 year olds. Tom and Marcia Lasswell take things a step further in their book, Marriage and the Family:
“Divorce rates are lowest for both men and women who marry for the first time at age 28 or later. The chances for a stable marriage increase as both partners reach the age of 30 and then the rates level off.”
Did you catch that? There’s a two in front of that eight, not a one. 28. Boy, that felt good! Let me say it again: According to the pros, the best age for marriage begins at age 28.
(And as this website proves, young people often have some rather skewed thoughts about marriage anyway! :)
Marrying vs. Burning
In the comments section of his entry, Amadeus points out Paul’s observation in I Corinthians 7:9 that it is better to marry than burn with passion. However, it’s clear that Paul’s comment there considers marriage a last resort, not the ideal. Remember, Paul considered staying single the ideal, a concept today’s society has all but forgotten, much less believes. In Paul’s mind, the single life was on the pedestal, not married life.
Two to Tango
When a person or a church culture pushes young to marry as soon as possible, what is often forgotten is that marriage is not a decision made alone. I suppose it’s the desire of many singles to marry eventually, but the fact is most of us haven’t found the right one yet – and it’s not for lack of trying! Therefore, the pressure for singles to marry is often unfair. For many of us who aren’t married, it’s not our fault. Even for those who could were given the choice to marry and chose not to, we should naturally assume they made the best decision for themselves and not question it.
Steaming in the Pressure Cooker
I’ve quoted this young lady before, but I think it would be timely to remind you of her words again:
“What kills me is that people in my church criticize you if all you talk about is how you want a guy. They tell you how you need to be content with yourself and find a work in God's kingdom and when you forget about it, God will send you someone. So then when you finally become content with yourself and boldly state that you don't want or need a man in your life, you are wrong again. They jump on you because you are not accepting the role God intended you to play as a woman, wife, and mother.”
To be continued . . .
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Bad News for Apostolics
There seems to be enough sadness and bad news in the newspaper headlines these days to fill a thousand universes. Most of the time I skip reading about all the rapes, tortures and murders because there are so many that they've become commonplace and far-removed from my comfortable little world. However, when Apostolics are involved in those headlines, the bad news hits a little closer to home. I'm like, "This is my family!" you know?
Sarah Lunde
It comes with not a little irony that the same week I celebrate my child with pictures on my blog that another woman is saying good-bye to her little angel. I'm sure by now you've all heard of poor Sarah Lunde, the Apostolic girl who was murdered by a "former" sex offender in Florida recently. Ninetyandnine.com has the full story with Cara Baker's article, "Apostolic Girl Slain After Youth Event."
Jody over at TheBandwagon, has a picture and some thoughts you'll definitely want to check out as well.
A Serial Killer in My Town
Apparently even my safe little community isn't immune to evil, as this article proves. Says the article,
"Port Arthur police are looking for a serial attacker after finding an elderly woman dead in her home only moments after another woman fought off a similar attack. A 60-year-old grandmother who lives in the 3100 block of Memorial Boulevard was attacked in her home by a man who she said was hiding in her closet. The woman said she was kicked several times in the chest and the man tried to strangle her. She said that her attacker fled on a blue bicycle headed south on Memorial Boulevard. While working the scene of that assault, police got a call that a woman was found dead in her home on Tyler Avenue."
That "60-year-old grandmother" is a woman in my church, one of my favorite saints actually. Thank God for His hand of protection on her! She's the only one so far who's faced the serial killer and lived to tell about it. Of course, she's a feisty lady too; in fact, I almost feel sorry for that man for trying to tangle with her. Almost.
Sober entry today, I know. Please keep these situations in your prayers.
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Yet Another New Blogger Enters the Blogosphere
Kimberly Rigney, another ninetyandnine.com contributor, has entered the blogsophere. Kimberly is rather unique in that every week those of us on her e-mail contact list receive a "Thought of the Week" e-mail where she shares her observations and inspirations in devotional form. I've been thinking for a long time that Kim would make a terrific blogger, and sure enough, she's decided to set up shop. You can read her ninetyandnine.com articles here:
I think you're really going to enjoy Kim, as her insights are always interesting and on-target. Go check her out at Originally Unoriginal.Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Making an Imperceptible Dent
Well, God gave me a chance to do a good deed today. I am always thankful for these little nuggets He throws my way, because it makes me feel a little better about my otherwise rather self-centered existence, for a little while anyway. I hope I don’t seem like I’m patting myself on the back by sharing this with you. That's the risk I run, but I tell this knowing you would have done the same thing had you been in my sensible black flats today.
A thirty minute lunch break to pick up some Luby’s To Go turned into two hours today when I came across a young girl crying on the side of the road because she was out of gas and out of money. So we drove all over town looking for a gas cans to get her car to a gas station – I can’t believe gas cans aren’t sold at gas stations! While she was filling up, I decided to play good Samaritan and bought her lunch too.
During our jaunt all over town, I slowly wheedled her story from her, and it was a depressingly common one: single mom with no job trying to live on child support while fruitlessly combing the job market. She dug into the depths of her rust-encrusted car and proudly produced a badly dog-eared picture of her one-year old son, who was breathtakingly gorgeous and probably has no idea he and his mama are dirt poor. The whole heart-wrenching experience produced a range of emotions I really can't express in words, but one thing that kept running through my mind was that old cliche, "There but for the grace of God go I."
She kept murmuring, over and over again, “God bless you! God bless you!” Finally I turned to her and said, “You know what? He has, and I’m thankful for the opportunity to give something back to Him.”
I drove back to work feeling that glow you get when you do something for someone, remembering Jesus’s words in Matthew 25:40, “And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”
God, I hope you enjoy the tank of gas and Subway sandwich I bought you today. Lord knows it was the very least I could do for what You’ve done for me.
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
From the Deep (Mostly Empty) Cavernous Recesses of My Mind Comes This Thought
There is a fine line between purity and prudishness. In fact, one might often be mistaken for the other. But the difference between them is that prudishness is purity without all the effort. Meanwhile, true purity involves a lot of work and little thanks, something few Christians -- and fewer people in general -- seem to give much credit to.
So the next time you're around someone who has a deep distaste for the first and accuses you of the second, feel free to fling the above in his/her face before graciously making your exit.
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Hair: What My Photo Album is Full Of
I've gotten some requests . . . okay, I've gotten two . . . for pictures of my daughter (who we are calling Max these days because she thinks it's funny. In case you are just joining us, her real name is McKenzie, and you can only imagine all the spin-off nicknames we derive from that.) Of course, those two requests were the only encouragement I needed to post a few pictures I just downloaded off my camera.
As you can see, both sets deal with the theme of hair. Max has lots of glorious curls, as you can tell, and we just love to love them. So without further ado, I present to you . . .
Hair in Motion
Bathtub Hairdo
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Getting Going on the 'Net
Yesterday I promised to give you some practical advice about how to get started on the web. Later on it occurred to me that I’m not exactly the greatest person to be giving that sort of advice, still being quite an amateur myself. Less than a year ago I was completely Internet illiterate! However, since I promised, I’ll do my best.
Blogging
Perhaps you could instead consider me the poster child for how easy it is to get on the Web. My first experience with publishing on the Internet came when I began blogging last August. Blogger, my blogging host, walks you straight through the steps of creating your own blog.
Type in “blogging hosts” in Google, and you’ll find hundreds of them. If you need a little help or some tips, don’t be afraid to contact another blogger for help. Remember, I’m only an e-mail away. I’ll try to help you as best as I can, and if I can’t, I’ll do my best to point you in the right direction.
Websites: Building the Basics
Building a website was a little scarier for me. I was terrified when I began my first web design class in college. All this jargon I’d heard swirled inside my head, and I was sure I’d never be able to make sense of it all. I still don’t have a clue about some things, but mastering the basics was easier than I thought.
Software
First you’ll need some software. I like (and use) Macromedia Flash and Dreamweaver, both of which have their pros and cons. Dreamweaver is easy to use, but requires a basic knowledge of graphic design, file types, and web browser requirements. Flash is trickier to learn, but requires very little knowledge of file types, as you can create most of your images within the software. I prefer to use Flash to create websites and use Dreamweaver’s FTP to upload them to the web. (FTP stands for File Transfer Protocol and is really just the doohickey that takes specific files from your computer and copies them onto your web pages so that you have a live site on the web.)
The software is expensive, but a thorough search on the ‘Net will probably yield some bargains. AcademicSuperstore is a great place to go for discounts if you’re a student, teacher, or employed by an education institution.
Then, of course, you’ll need to learn the software. I learned the software basics step-by-step from these two books: Dreamweaver MX 2004: Hands-On Training and Flash MX 2004: Hands-On Training. Also, check the software itself; many times it comes with tutorials included on the CDs. If working through a book isn’t for you, consider taking an online course, or perhaps a Continuing Education class at your local college/university. Many online courses are free as well. Other great resource websites include FlashKit, Macromedia and WebMonkey.
Web Site Design
Nothing will kill your credibility like poor web design or slow loading speeds, so it’s important to have a solid design for your website. Luckily, good design doesn’t always means fancy and over the top; simple designs can be elegant and appealing as well.
Do a little research. Surf some websites. Find out what appeals to you and what doesn’t, then try to figure out why. Click through them. Do you like the set-up? The navigation? Why or why not? Don’t be afraid to “borrow” design and structural ideas you like and incorporate them into your design. As long as you don’t copy a site down to the last pixel, it’s perfectly okay. I surf the web for design inspiration all the time.
Have people critique your site before you post it to the web and use their feedback to make your site more streamlined. If you need extra help or want to get really good, there are a number of books out there you can check out, such as this one.
Network
When you surf the web, don’t be afraid to e-mail webmasters or visit forums to find out what you want to know. Most people will be glad to help; and if they’re not, keep asking until you find one. With a resource as great as the Internet, there’s no good reason to stay ignorant about a subject very long.
Consider joining up with other people who have the same goals as you and create a web site together. If two heads are better than one, then five have got to be even better than two! And remember, you don’t have to do the same things other people are doing. The web sites that are successful are the websites that are doing something a little different.
Web Hosting
When you’ve finally got material worth sticking up on the Internet, you’ll need a web host – basically someone to give you access to a domain name (the words that go between the “www” and the “.com” in a web address) and provide other services like shopping carts if you’re selling products. I get my web hosting free through my college, but this web hosting service came highly recommended by one of my classmates for its low price and great service.
Final Words of Wisdom
I asked Kent Curry, ninetyandnine.com’s executive editor to pass along some things he learned from five years of building a successful web ministry. He was a little pressed for time (big-shot executive editors usually are) but he was kind enough to share a little bit of timely advice with us:
"If you want to minister, figure out your target audience and do everything you can to reach that audience. If you just want to blog or comment on life, that's fine, but figure out some angle that makes you different/more interesting from all the other bloggers, web zines, and everything else on the web today & push that angle hard. With perseverance, you will find your audience and they will find you. Hard, wise work will always be more effective than almost anything else - talent, connections, money."
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
My Apostolic Blogroll is Up!
I limited it to only those bloggers who have posted entries within the last month. For a more complete list, go check out Reggie's blogroll. Also, muchas gracias to him for telling me where to go to set it up. For this html-illiterate, his tips were very helpful. I also hope to post an additional list of non-A/P blogs I read and enjoy, so be looking for that soon as well.
If you read or write an A/P blog that isn't on my blogroll, by all means pass along the link to me. Thanks!
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
An Inspiring Vision for the Apostolic Church
As promised today, here is a letter I received from someone because of this week's series of blogging:
"Regarding your current blog entry about the tiny voice of Apostolics on the Internet, I concur!
"I blog, but my "religious" content is very low. I have a very small, niche target audience -- bicyclists in about a 60 square mile area around a small city north of Denver, Colorado. That said, my blog gets about a hundred loyal visitors every day, and I have influence with planners in Longmont and in Boulder County, and I have a foot in the door in the city of Denver, the Denver Regional Council of Governments (composed of all local governments in the Denver metro area), the Regional Transit District, and I'm working on state government influence.
"Because of my interest in bicycling, a lot of social liberals know my name in a positive way, which is a weird experience. Several of them know where I go to church. One, so far, has told me he'll visit some time in the near future. We'll see what happens. I've even had a couple of the far-left people tell me that I need to run for city council. Wouldn't that be interesting -- a religiously conservative, holiness-standard, home-schooling, Pentecostal minister endorsed for a city council seat by political leftists.
"The blogging is actually incidental to the influence -- the influence is gained the old fashioned way: face time, lunch, attending meetings and events, networking, shaking hands, etc.
"Regarding other Internet technologies -- web pages and what-not -- my goal is that my church's website becomes the number one item returned when somebody searches for a church in my city. That means developing content that's relevant for people in my city. People who are searching for a church don't care about our "mission statement" or "statement of doctrine" -- they want to find a place where they can find a friend.
"I imagine you guys are aware of Mark Condon's "Wrap the World in Worship" project. Bro Condon wants to make Apostolics THE go-to resource when people are looking for worship, praise, and music resources. WHAT IF our Sunday School and Youth and other ministry websites contained resources NOT ONLY for Apostolics, but resources that non-Apostolics would refer to because they are so excellent? WHAT IF people linked to Word Aflame on their websites right next to their recommendations for resources from Focus on the Family?
"We have a lot of talented folks doing stuff on the Internet, but much of what I see is directed solely to other Apostolics . . . I also have this dream of people looking to Apostolics for great resources on any number of different issues."
This man’s blog: http://www.masoner.net/bike/index.php4
This man’s church website: http://www.rangeview.org/
Your Blogger Again
I have two thoughts I'd like to pass on: first, that you A/P bloggers out there would step it up some, that those of you who are new to blogging would keep it up, and that those of you who don't blog already would start one up. (And when you do, please let me know.) Remember, you don't always have to write about religious topics to reach people. Apostolic commentary on a variety of topics is just as important.
My second thought concerns some new data uncovered by George Barna, the man who does much to slake my thirst for statistics. Says Barna of the unchurched in this article, "The religious media play a part in their spiritual life, too, with four out of ten absorbing Christian content through television, radio, magazines or faith-based websites during a typical month." [Emphasis mine.]
What are we doing to ensure this huge number of Christians are reading apostolic material when they log on? The answer is a not a whole lot. In an arena that is as accessible and as cheap as the Internet, our word warriors should be showing up in in full force, but great A/P resources are few and far between. What's more is that we have no reason to believe a large number of non-A/Ps are even aware of them. I've given it some thought, and I decided that tomorrow, to conclude my commentary, I'll give you some practical advice on how to get going on the web. In the meantime, it would be great if you could do two things for me:
- First, alert me to your blog/web ministry if you haven't already. I'm not necessarily wanting your church's website; I'm looking for information dessemination (resources) or a vehicle for establishing relationships with people on the web. (Of course, if your church's website offers those things, then by all means let me know.) In addition to a blogroll (which is coming soon), I'd also like to include a list of apostolic resources. Bible studies, sermons on the web -- all those things count!
- Ask yourself: "What would God have me do?" -- and then pray about it!
'Til tomorrow . . .
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
A Sneak Peek at the Birth of an Idea: Part 3
[Editor's Note: This is the second part of a three-part series of an e-mail conversation between ninetyandnine.com's executive editor Kent d Curry and this blogger concerning the ministry of blogging. To read part one, click here. For part two, click here.]
Friday, April 8, 2005: E-mail From Me to Kent
You know, I'm afraid that's what I'm going to have to do. Of the nine or ten A/P bloggers out there, only three of them fulfill the main criteria. I've already dedicated at least part of one post to highlighting all three of them and linking to their blogs. The rest are either newbies or they don't post often. Do you think I should have a post calling for more people to begin blogging, or for the current bloggers to "step it up"? Should I e-mail the lax bloggers and tell them if they'll write more I'll feature them? Perhaps they just need that sort of encouragement -- after all, the incentive to write is knowing people read your stuff. If they know they have a potential audience, maybe they'll be fired up to do better.
Or should I just leave things alone and let them develop on their own? Perhaps I should just add the sidebar and see what happens. What do you think? Perhaps I should compromise and feature all three of them at once and then leave things alone for a while after that? Trying to figure out the best way to handle it now that only three of them are dedicated bloggers . . .
April 8, 2005: E-mail From Kent to Me
You know what I think this is - this is 2-4 days worth of blog entries. I think you contact those 3 bloggers & start the process, but then you make some comments (from our emails) about the AP blogging community, your dream/intentions & their importance, but the slightest criteria disqualifies almost everyone. Let's see how others respond. Something like this:
Blog 1 - What I dream
Blog 2 - How I want to do it
Blog 3 - Why I can't
Blog 4 - Now I need you
Feel free to quote me & our conversations. Maybe you just cut & paste our emails & add a couple comments at the end..? I do think it's important for our future that you try this, but sharing your heart via our conversations might be the best way!
Finally (& maybe you don't include this part or maybe you do), part of why I'm reluctant w/newcomers is because I know how many hours 90&9 took (& still takes) to create every week. If 90&9 only came out when I had time, it might be monthly or bi-monthly. You have to be willing to let a ministry change your life - and that means welcoming inconvenience with a bearhug and a smile. Bloggers who are too busy to blog aren't bloggers, they're romantics who love the Idea of blogging. Sounds harsh, but it's true. It's like the old story where someone says to Famous. "You're so lucky." Famous replies, "Yes. And I've noticed the harder I work the luckier I get."
Or as Master Yoda said, "Do or do not. There is no try."
Jedi Apprentice Curry signing off.
Your Blogger Here Again!
I read a quote today (supposedly attributed to the Dalai Lama) that stated, "Pass along your knowledge. It's a way of gaining immortality." One of the great things about blogging and even the Internet is that it can be used as a way for anyone with a little computer knowledge to minister. You may not have the special skills, talent or time to minister at your church, but anyone can start a blog and pass along your knowledge to the rest of the world. Even if a blog's not for you, I encourage you to join one of the thousands of discussions on the web and bring your apostolic voice to the conversation.
Tomorrow we'll be hearing from a man with a very inspiring vision for Apostolics and our potential for being The Standard the rest of the world looks to for knowledge and resources. I'll save the remainder of my comments 'til then.
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
A Sneak Peek at the Birth of an Idea: Part 2
[Editor's Note: This is the second part of a three-part series of an e-mail conversation between ninetyandnine.com's executive editor Kent d Curry and this blogger concerning the ministry of blogging. To read part one, click here.]
Thursday, April 7, 2005: E-mail From Me to Kent
Ah, great minds must truly think alike (sometimes :) because that's the route my thoughts have taken as well, to spread the interviews out some. And no, it doesn't hurt that the benefits are mutual. When I do the sidebar html, I'm going to include a link to ninetyandnine as well. The bloggers can tinker with it as they like, but it will be there for them to add with no trouble on their part if they wish.
I may get both you and Josh to answer the interview questions for the "monthly" blog. That way you can explain the concept behind that very unique blog and Josh can have his say as well. I may keep doing that as new bloggers come on the scene each month.
That's a good idea about questioning them about their 90&9 knowledge. Nothing like a little shameless self-promotion! :)
Thursday, April 7, 2005: E-mail From Kent to Me
Frankly, I don't think I'd eblast EVERYone or people will get impatient when there's doesn't run for 10 weeks...
See, here's the tightrope - it's not our job to promote them. We earned our audience one reader at a time over 5.5 hard years. If they're really interested in ministering, they'll have to do the same. On the other hand, I don't want to be parsimonious w/our blessings. God's been good to us & I don't mind sharing the spotlight w/worthy blogs. BUT I do think we should promote maturing blogs (not the brand-new per se as it's easy to be excited at the start), & those who write every day (M-F). I've had some bloggers approach me about doing "Month" but when I look at their blogs, they write something about twice a week. If they're not that dedicated to their own cause, why will they be to mine? (That's why Sean was a no-brainer - interesting guy who pens something daily & 90&9 was already part of his world.)
So when I include 90&9 in the interview, it's not (just) shameless, but strengthening ourselves by making sure we create a loop of publicity for ourselves in the blogosphere. Then God can give the increase from there as He sees fit.
But interviewing a slew of new blogs that die after 4 months won't do us any good. (I mean, there's like 30,000-40,000 new blogs a month! How many of those will still be around in a year?)
Interviewing long-termers means we're blessing those who are putting in the time & effort w/out our assistance. So I would selectively interview those who've blogged for a while, while also creating links for all. Then you can just go down the list as they fit the criteria.
Does this criteria make sense?
k
Thursday, April 5, 2005: E-mail from Me to Kent
Yes, it does make sense. That's why I like running these things through you, because you're good at the logistics. (And I was just kidding about the "shameless" self-promotion, anyway.) The only problem I see is that most A/P bloggers have been blogging for only a few months, with the exception of Sean. I suppose I'll look at who blogs most frequently first, and then length online second.
The main reason I'm interested in doing this is because the more A/P presence we have online, the better, so I want to encourage that and garner support for those who are here. Also, to model unity and mutual support among A/P bloggers so perhaps they'll foster it as well. The "Godblogdom" is primarily populated with evangelicals so we A/Ps could definitely use a stronger voice in the blog arena. It's one way to combat the "cultic" or "heretical" label people often give us because they don't know any better, you know? I've noticed that the blogger neighborhood respects (for the most part) their fellow bloggers simply because they are contributing to the "marketplace" of ideas for the 21st century. Disagreement happens, yes, but so do great debates and the dissemination of truth as well.
Over the next few days I'll be examining each blog to see who posts often, how long they've been online, etc. Hopefully I'll be able to launch the first interview next week.
[Editor’s Note: Reggie of rj3blog has some good ideas about A/P bloggers as well in this post.]
Thursday, April 7, 2005: E-mail From Kent to Me
Oh I figured you were kidding about "shameless promo" but I still try to be careful. I don't want to be stingy w/God's blessings, but also don't want to dilute our own ministries.Your criteria about "most entries per week/day" & then longevity sounds fine to me. I think you're perfect to foster that unity & promote ideas in the Godblogging. A definite Plus for the kingdom. The only thing I'd add is don't feel obligated to push someone if No One fits the criteria. If all we have is sporadic newbies, then let's wait until they mature. Highlighting the undedicated probably won't help anyone & would diminish your purpose. Just put their links on the side & leave it at that.This is an exciting step forward! 90&9 is perfect to foster this. Keep me in the loop of progress!
k
To be continued . . .
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
A Sneak Peek at the Birth of an Idea: Part 1
If the Internet is truly the marketplace of the 21st century, and each blog is a "stall" where our goods (read: "ideas") are "sold," then it makes sense that we as Christians would want to show up in full force. And we have; yet among the evangelicals and orthodoxies, non-denominationals and emergents, the Apostolic voice is strangely weak. Sure, we’ve got plenty of websites with great resources, but few individual voices are being heard on a daily basis in the form of blogs and bloggers. That needs to change.
With the entrance of two new Apostolic/Pentecostal bloggers last week, the gears in my mind started turning: How could I promote other A/P bloggers on my blog and perhaps encourage new ones to join us? I came up with a relatively simple idea and decided to approach ninetyandnine.com's executive editor Kent d Curry about it since he’s good at taking my ideas and making them work. What will follow over the next couple of days is the e-mail conversation that ensued. Somehow it went from being a simple proposal of mine to a full-blown discussion about the nature of ministry. Instead of telling you what was said, I decided to let you take a peek at the entire decision-making process, knowing these e-mails will say more than I ever could in summary. This is one of those rare, behind-the-scenes glimpses at the makings of a blog (as if it's all a big mystery, you know), so enjoy it while it lasts!
Thursday, April 7, 2005: E-mail from Me to Kent
Considering the increasing number of A/P bloggers entering the blogosphere, I have this idea to take a week or two highlighting and featuring them on my blog. What I'd like to do is interview them on my blog (using the same five questions below for everybody) and then link to them.
Does that sound good to you? If so, I'll get started contacting them and get this going. I'd also like to coincide the first day of interviews with a sidebar on my blog listing and linking to them all. What I'll probably do is send out a mass e-mail contacting them all. When all have responded and answered back, I will then begin featuring them in alphabetical order by blog name. Interview questions below; feel free to make any suggestions to this whole idea. Thanks!
- First give us the basics: name, rank, serial number, etc.
- What are the three most important things you think your readers should know about you?
- What unique trait(s) do you bring to the blogosphere?
- Why did you decide to begin blogging?
- In general, what topics can your readers expect to read about on your blog?
Thursday, April 7, 2005: E-mail from Kent to Me
Okay, I like the idea a lot. It'd be a nice way to give them some PR & spread the blessings we've received. Don't have a problem w/you offering Ap links on a side column either.
Now, I don't like the idea of you doing it back-to-back-to-back. Might be a good way to lose a lot of readers. What if you did it as a Regular Tuesday Feature or something like that? That way you could highlight them w/out boring/overwhelming readers w/endless new blogs. IF they're like me, I check a new blog once, go back, then try to decide the value of a new blog. If I got a new one every day I'd probably not check any of them out. (Plus, I'd probably stop checking on "Odd" for a week as well.) Making it a regular feature seems like a good compromise by giving readers something to look forward to, giving you a "Day off" & promoting someone else...but you can disagree w/that impeccable reasoning if you like.
Questions 3 & 5 are very close. What if you combine them, but also asked: "When did you first hear about 90&9 & what's your favorite feature?" Yes, it's self-promotion, but it'll also make it easy for you to vet them by how much they actually know about us. The more they know, the quicker you promote them. Also, it would disseminate the mothership throughout the blogosphere, which only helps.
Best of all, each blogger is likely to mention when they're interviewed, so that promotes "odd" & "90&9" - which only increases our audience.
Thanks for throwing your creativity into this. You've got good ideas.
k
To be continued . . .
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Another New Blogger Enters the Blogosphere
Shana Blunt, also of ninetyandnine.com fame, wrote me yesterday to inform me of her new blog, if only it were fiction. My, my! This is the second new blog started this week by a fabulous female I've gotten to know via e-mail. Shana is the notable author of these articles:
I'm excited about this latest development as well; the entrance of more A/P bloggers into the blogosphere (or "Godblogdom" as we Christian bloggers like to say) can only be a good thing, especially when those bloggers are incredibly witty, insanely intelligent, very down-to-earth and deeply spiritual. (Those are only my opinions of course, but they're the only ones that count.) Now go check out Shana!Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
The Pope and the Prophecy
Here’s something really wild for all you who are following the recent events concerning the death of Pope John Paul II. According to this Newsmax article, there have been a series of "amazingly accurate" prophecies given concerning the last 112 popes of the Roman Catholic Church in which Pope John Paul II was the 110th. Says the article,
"Such has been the prophecy of St. Malachy, an Irish bishop who at his death in 1148 A.D. was discovered to have left behind a prophetic list of all future popes beginning with Pope Celestine II, whose papacy began in 1143 A.D. Malachy included a single line in Latin identifying a characteristic of each pope. Historians say Malachy's prediction – wherein he listed just 112 popes – has been amazingly accurate. According to his list, there [will be] just two more popes after the late John Paul II."
According to the article, the prophecy given about Pope John Paul 11 was, "From the Toil of the Sun." The article explains how this prophecy was fulfilled: "John Paul II was born on May 8, 1920 during an eclipse of the sun. Like the sun, he came out of the East (Poland). Like the sun, he visited countries all around the globe."
What’s even weirder is the fact that today – the day of the pope’s funeral – there will be a partial solar eclipse, the last one viewable in the US until 2012. Definitely strange!
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
The Dangers of Music Piracy
I’ll admit it: I used to be a pirate.
A music pirate, that is, until I realized it was highly hypocritical of me to be all fired up about holiness while stealing music off the Internet. It's a good thing, too, because that’s a sin that has particularly nasty consequences, as I recently found out.
Here’s the Deal
Music is illegally downloaded off the Internet largely through the use of peer-to-peer networks. As best as my non-technical mind can grasp the concept, peer-to-peer networks are basically thousands of computers linked together by Internet connections and software that allow users to share files back and forth. It’s easy; you simply go to a website that allows you to download and install peer to peer software for free. That same website will also host a search engine that searches all the hard drives of other users to find the song you request. You click download, the software links you up with the other user, and in a few minutes, the song is yours.
To a music lover, it’s a pretty cool deal: you now have free access to the digital music collections of thousands of people. Of course, it works both ways: thousands of people now have access to your digital music collection files as well, and that’s where the danger lies; peer to peer networks don’t differentiate between what are music files and what aren’t. That means all the files on your hard drive can be accessed by another P2P user.
Here's the Danger
Rick of See What You Share puts it this way:
“First you gave the P2P application permission to scan your hard drive for everything it thinks you might want you to share with other P2P users. These files include, Microsoft Word, Excel, Power Point, Outlook Email and Access documents, Adobe PDF's, ZIP files, Web History. Your Honeymoon pictures . . . your credit card statements generated from online payments, your "secret" file that contains your will, tax returns for several years and that one document with your credit card account numbers complete with PIN and VCC are also being shared world wide. But wait a second, how are these files being shared after you closed the application? Most P2P file sharing application defaults are set to "shrink" rather than close. Right clicking on the itty bitty icon there on your bottom right would make it stop sharing, but then again you never knew that you were sharing anything anyway.”
The result? Identity theft and something even more ominous – child kidnapping. Go check out the scenarios Rick clearly lays out. Scary stuff!
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
A New Blogger Enters the Blogosphere
Chantell Smith of ninetyandnine.com fame just wrote to inform me that she has started a new blog called Where You Can Find Me. Chantell is the author of several classic articles, including
I have had the privilege of conversing with Chantell via e-mail these past few months, and I have to say what a fantastic person I think she is. Reading her blog every day is going to be quite a treat, I think. Definitely go check her out!Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Can You See the Goo-Goo Eyes I'm Making Right Now?
I made a hard decision today. I decided not to buy a Mustang.
I had a dream last night that I did buy a Mustang and wound up being late to work this morning because I didn’t want the dream to end. As soon as I got a chance, I did some checking around, got a price quote and did a few calculations.
The trade-in value on my truck is about a grand more than I owe on it, which would make my notes on a Mustang only slightly higher than what I’m paying now. However, it would make my insurance go up, and I’d be looking at a vehicle note for four more years instead of just two.
Screaming Yellow. That would be the color I’d have picked.
When it came down to a decision-making time, I took an honest look at why I wanted a Mustang, and realized that I was simply lusting after the feeling owning such a status symbol would grant me. For a minute there, I could just imagine myself wearing pointy-toed heels and sliding in behind those sleek curves while some cute guy looked on with raised eyebrows. (Only to fast-forward three months down the road, where my much too realistic imagination dumps His Cuteness for being way too shallow, ironically.) The lust of the eye and the pride of life; how tempting they are! And how carnal and fleeting the feelings they bring.
That isn't to say I see anything wrong with driving a nice, sporty car if you can afford it, but for right now, it's so unfeasible for me it would be sinful. Maybe it'll be an option down the road after I buy a house, start a college investment fund for Miss Curly-Q, pay off my student loans . . but in the meantime I'll probably drive my plain ole dependable truck 'til it falls apart!
>Sigh< It was a nice dream while it lasted.
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Beauty Tips For Women Who Don't Wear Make-Up
[Editor's Note: The April Fool's photo essay promised for today's entry will be postponed until later in the week, or whenever Blonde Moment gets around to sending us the pictures.]
Whenever I attend large A/P conferences and gatherings, I am always struck by the fact that our organizations enjoy a high percentage of naturally beautiful women. I am not one of those women.
Thus, I am always frustrated to hear my guy friends exclaim, “There’s never any girls at this thing!” when seated down the aisle from us are whole rows of beautiful young ladies, none of whom I can hold a candle to. I always cringe at such remarks while nervously eyeing all the stunning blondes and wonder, “Gosh, what must I look like to these guys if they don’t find those girls attractive? Do they think I look like the ‘before’ photo in the magazine ad for The Betty Ford Center for Drug Rehabilitation or something?”
Let’s face it, girls. We all want to look our best. When we look our best, we feel better about ourselves, we have more confidence, we get that job we interviewed for, etc . . . but sometimes it’s hard to look our best. Unlike women who rely on cosmetic crutches to conceal, cover and camouflage their flaws, we definitely have our work cut out for us. Especially me. For years I sought long and hard for the best products to turn me into a beauty queen, but even though I've given up on that, I learned a few things along the way that have been very helpful to me and just may work for you too.
Get Rid of the Powder Keg
Oily complexions – the only thing good about them is that oily skin produces less wrinkles. Okay, so maybe I’ll look great when I’m fifty, but that doesn’t do me much good right now. Fortunately ladies, we no longer have to use the oily complexion shtick as an excuse to cake on the powder. Women who cake on layer after chalky layer in a losing battle to fight the shine will only attract a man who is interested in Just One Thing – Bozo the Clown, lusting over the size of your cosmetic case. So boot the Bozos and invest in several tubes of Mary Kay’s Oil Mattifier. This is the only mattifier I’ve tried that works long, hard hours for you, delivering matte skin for up to eight hours. At .6 fluid ounces, it’s my shortest best friend.
A Tuckered Pucker No More
Thin, pale lips – number one on my long list of beauty woes. Fortunately, a little peppermint oil (or its cheaper generic, cassia oil) added to your favorite lip balm will go a long way towards giving your lips some life without looking like you robbed the Clinique counter. Use those newly beautiful lips wisely, however. I don’t advocate flashing them Romeo’s way; instead, try speaking kindly to that skinny kid everyone else makes fun of.
Real-Life Rapunzels
It’s a paradox in Pentecostal circles. While we ladies have to pretty much leave our faces alone, we are discouraged from doing likewise with our hair. As long as it isn’t cut or dyed (or at least done so discreetly in some congregations), our hair is fair game for any new hair-do we can dream up. Woo-hoo! Unfortunately, this often leaves us resorting to all manner of torture devices that wind up frying our glory. In the interest of beautiful -- and healthy -- hair, I have two suggestions.
Heat damages your hair, but there’s no other way to get it dry in a hurry. Invest in a blow dryer that uses infrared heat, ceramic components and ionic particles. Whatever all that stuff means, it adds to up a much shorter drying time, which results in fewer frizzies. After you try one and fall in love, any monetary donations you send me to express your undying gratitude will go towards keeping ninetyandnine.com on the Internet. Of course, these hair dryers range from 70 – 200 dollars at retail stores, but I got my cherished Hai Hair Art dryer brand new on e-bay for only 38 bucks.
Use pink foam rollers whenever you can. They are inconvenient and uncomfortable at times, but the less you heat your hair, the healthier and shinier it will be. The curls you get from foam rollers are prettier and longer-lasting as well, and that’s saying a lot coming from this curl-challenged chick.
Even More
For some beauty tips from scripture, go here. Results guaranteed!
Got a non-make-up beauty tip or related favorite website you’d like to share with the rest of your sistahs in the Lord? E-mail it to me!
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
Happy April Fool's Day!
"Oh, dear God, you can consider this my first official prayer for this dude. And You'd better file it in a thick file, because if today's entry is any indication, there's gonna be many more prayers to follow."
Those were my thoughts as I read today's new A Month in My Life Blogger. Blonde Moment (here at work today because I recruited her to help me with an April Fool's joke) read over my shoulder and remarked, "This Victor guy sounds like a female version of you."
"Our father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name . . ."
"You think he's gonna get some flak?"
"I know he's gonna get some flak. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done. . ."
"You've got silly string underneath your fingernails."
"On earth as it is in heaven. I think I've got confetti in my unmentionables as well."
"How'd it get there? Do you know this Victor guy?"
"It's been flying around all morning! No, I don't associate with liberals."
"Why, because you're still in the closet? Are you gonna put the pictures I took today up on your blog?"
"Give us this day our daily cake, I mean, bread . . . yeah, I'm thinking about doing a photo essay for Monday's entry."
"Including the one of you in the pink do-rag where you're licking the icing off the plastic that came off the cake?"
"You think I hate myself? Of course not!"
"So about this Victor guy . . . you think he's cute?"
"Who cares?"
"He might just be the guy for you."
"Would you please stop seeing a potential boyfriend behind every bush? And no, he's not for me, because I'm never coming out of the closet. All hail to the ultra-connies!"
"Connie's down the hall. Yell louder."
"No, I mean . . . never mind. Look, just go download the pictures for me, please ma'am."
"Alright, but I'm gonna be keeping an eye on this Victor guy."
"You do that. And pray hard. This guy needs it. I better e-mail Kent, so he can nip all this foolishness in the bud real quick. What in the world was he thinking, hiring this guy? This could take down his whole little empire!"
"Must be a sign of the end times."
"Kent giving liberals internet real estate? Oh, no doubt."
Questions, comments, concerns? E-mail me! I reserve the right to quote you unless you ask otherwise.
