Men Getting Haircuts, Eschewing Tradition
I do believe I received my first haircut when I was 1, but these Sikhs don't cut theirs and a new generation, Western-influenced, are throwing care to the wind and: getting their hair cut! They are also abandoning the traditional turban, which, in my opinion, may help them get through airport security a bit faster here in the U.S. My wife recently walked into SFO airport with an expired driver's license and was thoroughly scrutinized, shpritzed, and searched before being allowed to board our jet.

Tattoo You?
Well, it's about time somebody said something about folks off-the-chain with their tattoos. The Marine Corps announced today that tattoos will be limited now, General James T. Conway stating that, "Some Marines have taken the liberty of tattooing themselves to a point that is contrary to our professional demeanor and the high standards America has come to expect from us," he said. "I believe tattoos of an excessive nature do not represent our traditional values."

Imagine that! Standards and values in the news! What is the world coming to? But I wonder, in my years of listening to sermons, I have not yet heard the word tattoo mentioned or alluded to. Do we have a General who could, perhaps, make a stand for the Ap world as well? Mighty quiet out there...

But of course, I do have an opinion and statement on this issue: don't.

Stu's Daily Dose of MF

I'm not sure how long I've been getting a free email from a guy named Matt Furey, but I get a little motivated reading his stuff, or looking at the photos of folks "bridging" or other healthful exercises. From what I've read, he married a Chinese lady and is heavy into the Chinese culture, especially the mindset of the people and their take on fitness and aging. Today, he writes on the pros and cons of watching T.V. He states:

"First, most television is negative. Most of it offers very little value and detracts from you playing an active role in life. Instead of being a DOER - you passively watch "other" DOERS.

"Second, some t.v. is fantastic. A number of programs for kids -
and adults - place you in a state of wonder and excitement to
learn new things.

"Third, the news is almost always something to avoid watching. Your
goal for today, this week or this month is probably not a worthwhile one
if it is nothing more than getting the latest scoop on Anna Nicole Smith
or Britney Spears."

He goes on to explain that although he has a giant-screen T.V., his library is much larger in comparison, and if he were offered money he would sell his set, yet not sell one of his books.

This guy is definitely a trip.

I Could Be Out of a JobI
If this fellow keeps it up, all us EMS and ER folks could be out of work soon. So let's hope he won't start I.V's any time soon.

Talk About a Stubborn Streak...
These folks just did not want to move. Read about the Little House in China.

The Most Dangerous Conference?
Click here for a link to what could be billed as the most dangerous conference in the world. Hailing from St. Louis, Missouri, a city recently voted Most Dangerous City in the U.S., is a conference featuring a dramatic interpretation of the life of Nona Freeman, previously believed to be deceased. Rumors of her death have been greatly exaggerated, in lieu of this updated press release.

In Georgia, We'd Eat That Monster's Legs
Thanks to that Mystery Man of Northern Vermont, "The V"for this link to something caught in Australia, suitable for cooking or fertilizer. Here in Macon, we eat 'em fried, and they do, indeed, taste like chicken.

Canvas in the Wind (with apologies to Elton John)

Goodbye Anna Nichole
Though I never knew watched you at all
You had the grace to publicize yourself
Built a career on talk that’s small

They posted you on TV
And they shouted out your fame
They set you on the talk show
And they made you speak your brain

(chorus)
And it seems to me you lived your life
Like a canvas in the wind
Never knowing what man to cling to
When the rain set in
And I would have liked to have known you
Before the glamour, glitz and surgery
Your candle burned out long before
Your legend ever did

Superstardom was tough
The toughest role you ever played
Hollywood created that superstar
While your observations on life were lame
Even when you died
Oh the press still hounded you
CNN has talked on you non-stop
Selling millions in ads built on your fame

Goodbye Anna Nichole
From the young man who didn’t watch your show
Who sees you as something as more than sexual
More than just Madonna’s foe

(chorus)
And it seems to me you lived your life
Like a canvas in the wind
Never knowing what producer to cling to
When the rain set in
And I would have liked to have known you
Before the glamour, glitz and surgery
Your candle burned out long before
Your legend ever did

Come To Cherry Blossom Festival in Macon, Georgia
FREE ICE CREAM!

Tomorrow, Sunday will be the last day to jump in on the thrilling activities in my hometown of Macon, Georgia, birthplace of Little Richard of "Tutti-Frutti" fame. You can opt to sample free ice cream, gander at the bronze statue of Otis Redding looking over the dock of the Ocmulgee River, or stand in line with these other tourists to get something or another that I can't identify here. Pink pancakes Saturday and Sunday morning will be cooked and sold by none other than my old cronies, those derelicts of emergency work, the Fire Department.

I can hardly stand the excitement.

Underdog Chess Team Stomps Ivy Leaguers
Who ever thought this would happen?

Terr'ble, Simply Terr'ble
My blogging has been terr'ble these past two weeks, I know, but the wife is recovering! Sorry I can't give more details, but it was a common surgery. So Stu the nurse (RN) is helping the other half recupe, cooking for her and being there. I work tonight and Saturday night and Monday night (working for one of my RN buds on vacation), but see a dramatic increase of yardwork in my near future as the missus declares it, the yard, unfit.

Just When You Thought It Was Safe
...to be a tourist and look at historical stuff whilst your kids kick each other in the shins, this Grand Canyon overhang comes along. I've already decided that I will opt not to partake of this overlook, but will be content to look at the Grand Canyon while standing safely on rock. But I can't imagine taking a child or flaming youth here, because...BILLY GET AWAY FROM THERE YOU'RE TOO CLOSEEEAAAAAAIIIIEEEeeeeeee!

A Boy and Baseball

Yesterday, Tuesday, March 20th I had the honor of attending the dedication of the Ben Harden Memorial Field (baseball). My friend, the father of Ben Harden invited me to the ceremony, and I was able to meet most of his family. If you remember, I was the fireman/paramedic first on the scene when Ben was hit by a car when he was only 5 years old. He lived another three days after the accident. Here is the link and the rest of the story.

I will supply the article I wrote about the accident that clear day on Thanksgiving, seven years ago, upon request. Or you can search the November articles of this y'here blog and find the link there. It was a solemn, yet cheerful ceremony yesterday, a spring day, the sun setting, cool wind, and the memory and name of a boy whose life was cut short now memorialized on a field of the game he loved.

More Fun Foibles From Frisco

I know I did a pitiful job of relaying to you the things going on in San Francisco the week I was there. I was working on my boy's laptop, and I don't type so good on it. Plus, I was trying to rush and get out and see the city. We stayed on the Wharf, could see the Golden Gate bridge out of our window, Alcatraz was directly in front of the hotel, and the cable car's embarcadi and finissimo was across the street from us.

Okay, so you've never been to Frisco, or maybe you have. This was my first time on the West Coast and I did not surf this time, but did take the elevator up to the top of Coit Tower (see photo) which gave me a birds-eye view of the city and bay. There are many, many touristimos everywhere and most did not speak my native tongue of Americanese. GB Shaw hinted in his play Pygmalion that Americans haven't spoken it [English] for years.

So, before you fall dead asleep from reading my post, I offer to you, reader of House Calls, this top-ten list absolutely free simply for the reading. These ten items are tax free, except in the state of California in which case you will be charged the local currency in that state of ten pesos per item listed. Here goes nothing.

10. I only saw one identifiable gay person the entire week in SF.

9. It's tough for 2 people to eat in a SF restaurant for less than $50, including lunch menus.

8. It cost 60 bucks for 4 folks to ride to the airport in a shuttle van packed like sardines.

7. The wind always blows in the Wharf area and will chill your bones.

6. People walk, skate, ride bikes and jog across the Golden Gate bridge.

5. The cable cars are both practical transportation and the most fun thing to do in SF.

4. Everyone in SF appears thin and fit, probably from walking the hills, which are everywhere.

3. Barnes & Nobles still lets you read their books for free, even in SF.

2. Tax in SF is 8.5% on the dollar. Ouch.

1. You can't throw a rock far without hitting a street person/busker/mime/etc.

(photo: Manly Christians in San Diego pull Sunday School bus to church.)

Are We Not MEN? We Are Christ-ians
I was alerted to this article and surprising movement of men who want to move away from a wimpy Christianity to a more manly, strong image of what Christian men should represent. I agree, and it looks like, from what I've read so far, that this is good stuff. Dude. Oh, and don't forget they were first called Christ-ians at Antioch, a town probably known for spelling bees and grammatical scholars of old.

Stu Goes Back to...ugh...Work

GOING BACK to w0rk ranks up there with being sick on vacation, getting a big honkin nose zit the day before prom pictures, and a dent in your new car. It was tough for me last night, and I have to relay the grossest of ER stories, worse than trauma: decubitis ulcer, stage 4. What appears to be a fist size hole in the patient's back is none other than what we weird persons of the medical field refer to as a decubitis. Sorry, but it is much worse in person than relaying it to you here at House Calls.

Also, there is a new computerized charting system that is almost paperless. Odd, after all these years of paper charting, we go full computer. The journey will be complete on the day that all our dinosaur docs put their own orders in the computer! Presently, some of them balk at the idea, stating they didn't go to secretary school they went to medical school! Oh yeah, I'm talking MD's here.

Third, a good friend of mine, RN at ER for 10 years, decided yesterday, in the middle of the shift, to quit. Don't know any details now, but hope to learn why soon. So that was sort of the straw that broke the camel's back, proverbially speaking. I was ready to go home at midnight, but alas, dragged out my 12-hour shift and made it home.

First day back at work after nearly 14 off. I was able to share some fond memories of San Francisco with my cohorts, which made part of the night pass quickly. Hope tonight goes smoother.

The Proverbs 31 Single Woman: Possible?
I just now re-read Proverbs 31, and without the husband references, there is no reason why this chapter could not refer to a single sister as well. I know plenty of women who fit this description, and I know one in particular who lives these verses:

She is clothed with strength and dignity,
and she laughs without fear of the future.
When she speaks, her words are wise,
and she gives instructions with kindness.

So, lighten up and live your life, never regretting the past, but looking foward to the future. And may the devil's behind have your shoeprints on it.

I Discovered Two Things Today
I finally caught a viable link to the Lizness blog, watched the short films, and feel entertained in general. But, most of all I feel like kickin' the devil's behind, since after all, it was mentioned in a special testimony service. I can't explain it all, it's too deep, but go there and read for yourself the confessions of a choir director, whose dayjob involves an ottoman constructed entirely from pillows.

Second, I found out that there is a 90&9 Contributor Guest Room at the KC Manor in St. Louis, Missouri, otherwise known as The Most Dangerous City in the United States. So, next time I layover at the airport, possibly for transporting self-defense weapons in that city, I will give my brother a call, to take the advantage that Mr. Bunch took. I wonder...is it anything like the Lincoln Bedroom at the White House?

Three San Fran Styles
You Won't Catch
Stu Wearing
in This Decade

Greetings From Home Again, Home Again
Sorry for the scanty details last week while in Frisco, but the laptop is 'bout impossible to type on. Plus the family was ready to go with little tolerance for Dad's internet talent. And go we did. Flew home Saturday to Atlanta, take-off at 2:11pm San Fran time, landed at 9:00pm Atlanta time, PLUS it was the daylight savings changeover night so we lost another hour. I was in the sack at 3AM. At long last.

Sunday was 2 services and a case of jet-lag. Monday was the wife's surgery. Doing fine now.

So, I need to do some serious catching up on the trip, fill you readers of House Calls (all 4 of you) in on the SF details, give some recommendations on your trip there, should you feel inclined to go in the near future. And I will ask the one question that enquiring minds want to know: Why does transportation cost so blooming much in San Francisco, California? The answer: perhaps the fuel is organic like everything else in SF.

Final day in SF
The only thought for this day: The amount of "beautiful" folk is directly proportionate to the amount of glass storefronts.

Day #4 in SF California

I'm not believing that I was sick and the wife wouldn't let me go outside (my personal healthcare attendant) in the wind so I could get well. I did venture down to the Mermaid for brunch, across the street to enquire at the maritime bookstore @ pirates and/or U.S. Lifesaving service. Sorry, says the 2 employees occupied with a Matt damon movie on a mini-DVD player. So I found two incredible finds myself. One on the Outer Banks Lifesaving crew, all black, that were some of the most courageous the Service ever saw. Also a book by a Harvard undergrad who signed on as a common seaman on a boat going 'round the Horn to CA. Cured his eyesight.

I s'pose I get more travelling in from a good book than dashing from tourist jaunt-to-jaunt.

Sour grapes.

Tuesday at Union Square, or, On Top of it Anyway
We took our first cable car ride, all the way to Union Square where there is...shopping. Ugh. First we ate on top of Macy's, literally, outside on the roof eight stories up. A seagull came to visit us while we were eating, and we got a few pics of him. We shopped in the bargain basement at Marshall's, bought a few items of clothing for a song, then ventured to Nordstrom at Westfield Mall which is the biggest Mall I will ever go in, I promise.

Oh yeah, the cable car is fun, but the wind cutting into me with my still present cold and cough. Had to wait in line to take the cable home, got on the wrong line and ended up walking 8 blocks home. After a visit to Barnes and Noble double-decker.

A fun day, I'm really feeling bad, and crashed. Not a thrilling blog today, I tell ya.

A Day at Fisherman's Wharf
We're staying on the 'Wharf, which is rather touristy, which leads me to believe that I could substitute Chattanooga, Myrtle Beach, etc, close my eyes and there would be little difference. Except for the historical stuff, like Boudin's Bakery for authentic Sourdough bread avec tour of the bakery.

Next was the Aquarium with 2 tunnels of fish, rays swimming overhead, kids squealing with delight. We never saw the Bushman, but there was a covey of homeless milling about, some with show, others rattling an In-and-Out Burger cup. Oh yeah, the seals barking was the best show, but with my eyes closed...I was at Atlanta Zoo.

Okay, so I had a terrible cold, throat that felt like razor blades were inserted when the wind whipped around my head, so I'll try not to be too negative. Finally, took a taxi to the Davies Symphony Hall for a piano performance by virtuoso Murray Parahia. Not sure about the spelling. Our idea was to eat after the show, which ended at 10p.

So, we started walking, not on a hilly street, mind you, but ALL the way back to the wharf! My estimate is 25-30 blocks, and after 5 blocks, the wife took off her heels and went au naturel (barefoot)! She went straight to the hotel room, while the boys and I ventured the final block to In-and-Out Burgers. Inside, escaping the cool evening were all the street folk eating supper with the money collected during the day...I watched one pay with bills.

As I sent the wife off to the room, headed for the burger joint I stepped around what appeared to be a young woman with 10" platform clogs, long coat and extra clothing typical of the street crowd. But what bothered me was the baby doll she carried hooked under her left arm. Don't know the reason, I can only guess what horror stamped her memory so that she resigned herself to wandering the streets. Wondering as I lay down to sleep if we could have helped her in some way.

Tomorrow: cable car ride. Thanks for reading! -stu

The Golden Gate Experience

I have taken the elevator to the top of the Empire State Building.

I have flown across the Atlantic Ocean.

Yesterday, I drove across the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco.

The best part of getting across the Golden Gate is the other side, at the lookout point, with dramatic grassy hills rising above the bridge, a spectacular view of San Fran ahead, with Sausalito below. The coolest thing there was this guy balancing rocks. Oh yeah, it was strange.

Oh, and also, I forded the Ohoopee River in Georgia.

They finally figged it: ask the aliens!

Thanks to The V for this newsflash. By the way, it's a sunny 68 today in SF.

Made it To San Fran Alive & Kickin'

The family herded our way West past Indians, blazing a trail to the Land of Gold: California. Stay tuned for details, haven't done much but sleep so far. We saw the Golden Gate at night with lights, rode through the city and ate Chinese take out. No thrills so far except seeing loved ones. We play tourist today.

p.s. Hard typpin oon this lapppptoop.

Gone to San Fran
Please standby as stu goes to SF, California avec family for Spring Break. Stay tuned...
Thanks!
-stu

Waffle House...Our House

In an independent taste test Waffle House coffee was voted America's best tasting restaurant coffee in the U.S. Honestly, I was the lone researcher, but fortunately the only writer at House Calls, so my opinion rules. I checked out Waffle House, Our House this morning and the stories there give me that same warm fuzzy feeling every time I visit my local Waffle House.

One Reason is that if you were blindfolded and air-lifted to any city in the U.S. and lowered to the front door of the Waffle House you would not see any difference. I mean, sure, the bathroom in some of them is on the left and some have it on the right. But other than that, you can get you a plate of grits and a waffle with eggs for under 5 bucks. What a deal.

And to think that, as we speak, there are supposed neutral reaearch groups that don't agree with me. Read the rest of stu's House Calls and you'll see where I'm going with this. By the way, Waffle House now takes debit cards (whew).

The Democrats and Their New Faux Pas
Hillary, John Edwards, Joe Biden, Chris Dodd, and Osama Bin Laden have all announced that their "yes" vote for America to wage war against Saddam Hussein was a great big OOPS. But now let's think about this thing for a minute—The Red Counties of the U.S. elected our current president. So are the Dems simply not concerned that we, the Red Counties and States of these Unites States are not offended by their remarks?

I, for One, am offended by your statements, Mr & Mrs Spineless Congressperson who didn't have the backbone to vote your mind in the first place. Your apology is not genuine, and it only throws light on the fact that you went with the flow, which to us Red County Citizens, was the right thing to do. So let me see if I, a blogger of no means, can come up with a suitable analogy to this situation...

Let's s'pose that, McDonald's coffee was voted as the Number One coffee in the U.S. so Hillary joins in and says (for a mere $12 million endorsement fee) that McDonald's coffee is her choice and gets her vote as Number One. So everyone is drinking MickD's Number One coffee and we're all happy and skipping through the kids play area at our local McDonald's when all-of-a-sudden a NEWS FLASH comes across the wire that all this time MickD's was using coffee beans planted near the former site of Chernobyl and anyone who ever drank a single cup of McDonald's coffee will develop liver disease and grow an extra ear on their stomach and Hillary will say, "Voting for McDonald's coffee was MY MISTAKE."

But then a leading scientist releases a report stating that the whole coffee issue is libel created by the owner of Earl's Tire N' Appliance coffee machine in the waiting room, McDonald's reneges on it's Hillary endorsement, everyone's drinking coffee again, and Hillary moves back to Arkansas with Bill to sell real estate.

McDonald's Coffee Number One?
This news flash, that Consumer Reports rated McDonald's the best tasting coffee is quite a surprise. I guess you could say it is Number One, that is, if you would say that it doesn't taste like Number Two. The other companies MickD's was compared to were Burger King, Starbucks, Dunkin Donuts, and the coffee machine at Earl's Tire N' Appliance waiting room.

I'm thinking...now what happened to Waffle House in this taste test (my choice)? Or maybe it's the flipside of wine tasting, whereas the more wine the judges drink, the higher the score. For example:

Pierre: Voila les judges, which el vino tastes the best?
Marsean: Oui, m'sieur, thish shample nrumberrr 32 is exquishite (hic)!
Pierre: Ah but non Marsean! You have drunk the coffee creamer!

But with coffee tasting, the first cup is the best, because after the tenth cup of coffee the judge would be having a manic bi-polar fit. The first 2-3 cups are the only ones he'll remember, as the rest were not even tasted as the judge lost his concentration and began searching the racks...at the tire store. Earl's that is.

Lest we forget, MickD's was sued for several million bucks a few years back and lost because a woman spilled hot coffee in her lap at the drive thru. This campaign and errant taste test is simply a ploy to regain some of that cash back. But if you think that McDonald's is a place to get good coffee, then go right ahead. But don't forget your morning dose of Haldol, please.