Stu's Wednesday Attitude and Friends

Gripped by Irrational Exhuberance

I happened across this NY Times piece on a guy roadtripping through my fair state of Georgia, and I have yet to see what he makes of it. All I can say is he ain't seen nothin' yet until he eats at Clem's Mostly Pork BBQ and Washerette. Yee-HAH!

ER Story of the Night
My patient arrives via EMS on backboard with c-collar and tells the doc that she was on her way to the ER when she had a wreck. So, she was checked out for a neck injury (negative) and treated for her other problem: ant bite. Tomorrow: where do all the ER patients go, or, Is there Life after ER?

Getchyer Pat Mcmanus Today!
I forgot all about one of my favorite writers of fiction, although this guy thinks Washington is out yonder near Oregon. I do double dare anyone to check this guy out and have a read today. We'll leave the ethereal fiction to my buds over at the 'scope.

The Wife-Swapping Hoovers Update
Here's a link to the great things that are resonating in the Hoovers' life months after their Wife-Swap apearance.

Memorial Day

In order to honor a veteran today, I thought of a brother of mine, Bernard Hileman, WWII veteran who left us only a few years ago. His testimony is amazing, as he was on a transport ship and became quite ill, was transferred to another ship, while the original ship was attacked and sunk by an enemy vessel. Bernie, as we knew him, was a survivor of WWII for that reason, and went on to raise a large family of his own and pass down a legacy of love. Yes, anyone who knew Bernie could not help but love the guy—I know I did, and played golf with him even while in his 80's. And he was a dear brother in the Lord who never failed to encourage me with some of his wisdom. This is the time to honor him and all veterans who served me and you in past wars and duty. This is Memorial Day weekend...God Bless you Bernie! I miss you.

18 y/o Climbs 7 Highest Peaks
Okay, so I've been working too much, but this is amazing news, that an 18 year-old girl from California climbed Everest with her Dad. Makes me want to whip out my copy of Into Thin Air and read it all over again. The last time I read it was Spring also and the book seemed to keep me cool, or is this a phenomena apparent only to me?

A Confederacy of Dunces?
Amazing to think that in these post-modern times we celebrate a season of illiteracy, concerning Bible reading that is. What some may call informatoglut is really a disguise for laziness, else the search for mootness and mediocrity. Play it safe. Until they burn your Bible, and then it may be too late.

ER Surprise

I was walking across the Trauma Bay in my ER last night and glanced over to see a guy lying on the table, looked to be about 25 or so. He was a dead guy. Yikes. Shot by a jealous ex-boyfriend of his current girlfriend. They had worked him, but he didn't make it. Another weird snapshot in the life of an ER nurse: stu.

Bunch Bargains Best Book Binge
Check out what the Dave is doing over at his blog re: a book club including online discussion and donuts. Well, maybe not the donuts. But it looks like an idea waiting to happen. See what's up.

Mission: ER : 0430: Wednesday: 5/23/07

So I'm sitting here thinking about how blunt my last post sounded, what with de-clothing patients sans choice and drawing blood. But tonight, I'm having a very quiet moment with an 80 year-old lady, very petite, and nearing the end of life: she is a cancer patient.

Her daughter was here earlier, before midnight, but now it's only the two of us. I hung her second unit of RBC's (blood) and have to wait 15 minutes before rechecking vital and making sure no reaction occurs. I ask about her grandchildren, her children, I tell her about my mother and how Mom didn't have a chance to know my siblings' children because she died in December.

The lights were low, only a lamp over the bed, the soft whooshing of the IMED pump, catcalls and laughter in the hallway (yep, at 0430) and I realize that her life is passing away at this moment. Sure she's getting renewed with the blood, but the chemo has whittled her body down to a mere stick where once was a tree.

When she looks me in the eye to say "Sorry" about my mom, I see a glimpse of fear that I had not noticed before. I want to help, but in this early morning hour, I offer good cheer and my ear to listen. But she doesn't talk, only replies to my questions.

My fifteen minutes of fame is now up and I do mention to her that The Lord's timing is just in every life and that we don't know why some are given longer to live than others, and she nods in agreement. She's wearing an elegant navy-blue hat to hide her baldness from the chemo, and she looks dressed for church.

She thanks me for helping her gain some health tonight, and the fear is in her voice again, since she knows that her time here is limited. So I take her frail, white hand in mine and thank her for being a good patient, and wish her well. She holds my hand a bit longer than I expected. I smile at her, and leave, not wanting to, but it is nearly time for me to go home and rest.

For her too.

(ER staff performs a trendelenburg maneuver in order to draw samples from patient)

What It Is, Is a'mergency

Definition of emergency
Emergency is the name of the game where I work, in a Level I Trauma Center, smack dab in the middle of Georgia. But there are two things most folks don't realize when they enter the Emergency Room, or ER for short:
1. We will take blood from you.
2. We will probably cut your clothes off.
We need a small sample of blood to send off to the lab so we can tell what you've been drinking, inhaling and ingesting. And we cut your clothes off because someone injured will not feel up to it, and we also have to make sure you're not carrying a weapon. So there, the next time you're in an accident, remember those two items and send your lawyer to the ER instead.

The Waiting Game
At the ER, we find it necessary to make folks wait, because it takes a boatload of time to cut your clothes off, draw blood and start an I.V., and collect various samples of output from you before dashing it off to the lab. At my ER, we have the tube system, exactly like the one at you local bank, where you sign your check, seal it in the tube and FOOF! it vacuums itself over to the nice teller smiling and sitting behind 2" bulletproof glass. Except we send our blood and output samples through this type of system, and every once in awhile sump'n jams up and—ugh—there is a huge mess for someone to clean up above the ceiling tiles. Plus, your lab personnel will not be smiling any longer.

We Are Not the Restaurant
For some reason, folks who are patients became needy and demanding the moment their big balooga body hits the stretcher in the room. They suddenly feel the need to ask for a glass of water, meal to eat, something to output into, a blanket, a more comfortable bed, the location of the phone/remote control/bathroom, and last but not least: they need someone to clean up the [output] that just occurred within minutes of parking in the bed. Our response is necessary in maintaining good nurse-patient relationships, so we answer them as friendly as possible (NO!).
If there were an ER on any of those dog-awful reality survivor shows, then much of the programming would involve the contestants clamoring to get into the ER so that all their needs could be met. But they wouldn't ever leave since we will promptly, after drawing several vials of blood from them, cut their clothes off.

A Modern Day Foot Washing

Involving Serious Household Chemicals

I found this article by Nashville's own darling of Bible-quizzing, on 90&9 that strikes close to heart: moving day. I exhort you, yea beloved and those within the sound of my voice, to read her account of humble duty and repent if you have been guilty of the same with moves of your own.

MZ To Go One Month Internet/computer Free
Read this amazing final blog entry of MZ from Vermont who has slated to go internet-free for one month! She has consented to have paralyzing drugs standing by, Medics with defibrillators on drive-by status. Are we really that addicted? Can the whole internet experience become moot after so many hours slogged away on trivialities including shallow emails in lieu of a longer, more meaningful snailmail-letters to a loved one or friend? Is this the end?

Friday's Here...Where da gold At?

Right now, rain is gold in Georgia and a few other states that are terribly dry. I guess it's time to summon the courage and faith of great men of the Bible, none* of which I can remember the name of at this time. I get like this after a 12-hour shift in the ER. But next week, I shall do better and update you on
1. stu stairs
2. the Insurgency in Iraq (note: I didn't say war)
3. Why 97% of women feel uncomfy at the pool (avec les chemises de lave)

So, stay tuned, and I'll be finissez-moi with a 4 day straight 12's work week.



*Elijah?

We Temporarily Interrupt This Blog...
..to go to work for Night # 3 at the ER. I am having fun, by the way, working with all sorts of fun people with all sorts of fun and exciting reasons why and how they are visiting our fair ER.

Where is that good-fa-nothin' rain?

It's All About Fried Pork Chops

A northern bud alerted me to this article about a higher incidence of stroke in the South, especially Mississippi, which also ranks 50th in education. But I assure you, it has everything to do with deep-frying, an art I learned about in my fire department days. The recipe is simple:

Ingredients: One chicken, hog, squirrel, etc.
Preparation: Heat up 4 to 5 inches of lard, Crisco®, etc in one large cast-iron pot.
Cook high/low fat meat 'til cripsy golden.
Eat.

( L-R: Amy Tan, Kim the Blogger, The Queen Mum, Stephen King[author])

Click Over Yonder To A Girl Blog
Yes, I am recommending this special feature blog over at 90&9 featuring a school teacher who has actually kept my attention all week(s). I'm thinking I'll have to send her one of my Cheaper Ways books by Cara L. Davis once they arrive by U.S. Post, that is, as long as she put on enough postage to cover the hike from 39 to 41 cents. If they keep raising the price of stamps, I'll stop mailing all together except at Christmas and...hey that's what I do already. Except I forgot to mail them the past 3 years or more.

The stu-tunnel, Again
I worked Sunday night, and started another 4-in-a-row last (Tuesday) night at the ER, or EC in our book, for Emergency Center. So bear with me, as I am aware that my posts have reached a new shallowness never seen before. Or maybe so. But anyway, I'll be either
1. working from 7p-a
2. sleeping from 9a-5p.

I'm also doing stairs (see photo above) now in order to restore my trim, girlish figure.

Man Stands On One Fanger*
Kids, don't try this at home.


*Fanger: single digit of human hand.

Divorce Down, Either from Shacking or Sticking With It

No more talk of 1-out-of-2 marriages ending in divorce after researchers have discovered that the divorce rate has dropped dramatically since the 80's. One theory is that more folks are shacking up, while the other side claims that more couples are making it work via counseling, idealism, or just plain stick-to-it-iveness. Which side are you on?

Where is the RAIN (Day 2)?
Still no rain in Mactown, GA.

Who's Afraid of Wendy Shalit?
I ran across this blog through a reference at another site. Wendy has written book entitled, A Return to Modesty: Discovering the Lost Virtue, and was given a book contract after writing a scathing article about unisex bathrooms at Williams College. Her blog looks interesting, especially considering she is not of AP ranks. She also wrote Girls Gone Mild: Young Women Reclaim Self-Respect and Find It's Not Bad to Be Good.

Quittin' My Job To Write A Song-a-Week
This guy did it and is having success. Could this be modern day busking, of which I see more in European countries than the good ole USA? So hop over to this article and have a read, or to his blog and have a listen. Oh, and the guy's initials are JC...

Greeaaaat Stuff at ninetyandnine.com today

Check out the great articles, letters, and one answer survey, not to mention an article on salads, yes salads at 90&9!

How Dry Is It in Georgia?
This dry. In other words, we need rain.

Happy Mothers Day...to ALL MOMS OUT THERE!

They're Not Watching After All!

Thanks to The Ed and The V both for this insightful current news article about the American viewing public.

Fat
Foke
Inside
of
Thin
Foke?
Thanks to alert reader The V for sending me this link.

Ten Reasons I Believe in
Global Warming

10. IPOC* thinks hurricanes come from GW.

9. Cattle fed growth hormone are expelling hotter pies.

8. Al Gore is giving more [hot air] speeches.

7. Roger Federer is warming to the idea of winning on clay.

6. Women's spring/summer attire causes a rise in male core temps.

5. The sun looks brighter.

4. GW is causing American Idol.

3. My lawn needs watering.

2. GW is influenced by a recent outbreak of tanning booths.

1. Al Gore is full of heat.

Now That the Hoopla Has Died Down...
For all the ads for the film 300, I had to protest the fact that author Steven Pressfield had already written a brilliant novel on the war at Thermopoles entitled Gates of Fire. See what he has to say about the film and his gracious repsonse to the fact that the movie may steal some of his thunder.

Question #2 on the (not-so) Great TV Debate

Continuing with my view from the middle-of-the-roaders, or the Reluctant Progressives, I shall now answer # 2 of the editor's TV questions:

2. Do you foresee a time when TV and/or TV advertising will be adopted? Will the passing of time smooth your adoption of TV? How much time will be needed for this to happen?

I have noticed a trend among hardliners who say TV is evilevilevil but who also spend quality time after church service glued to CNN at the restaurant at the exclusion of conversation with others at the table. Also, this breed has adopted the internet whole-heartedly, with high-speed dsl or cable hook-up at the house which allows the watching of all things video on the internet, including TV shows, sporting events and live newscasts. To me, the hardliners approach and adoption of TV is softened by embracing internet technology.

As for a timeframe, I'm not sure when this will happen. Probably with the passing of the reins to a younger hardliner who has grown up with internet and video. Widespread addiction to internet pornography may undermine the TV question altogether, by which I mean nude or semi-nude photos and video on myspace, facebook, AOL, Yahoo, youtube...you name it, it's there. Also, it is possible to click through every television channel and not chance upon the extreme pornography available to internet users with one or two clicks.

I do foresee a time when TV advertising will be utilized the same as a billboard is utilized by hardliners. But by then, it may be too late. In less than ten years we have adopted the medium of internet to tell us everything we used to get from newspapers, magazines, and television combined. It can be accessed anywhere with a laptop, even a cell phone, and is rendering the entire TV issue as a moot point faster than we care to believe. Or at least the hardliner wants to believe.

My Internet-Free Life

Am I addicted to the internet? One fellow thinks so, and he went one month without. Friends thought he was crazy, yet he discovered something during this time that is worth reading about. The man is an author of books, and has offered up his month's experience in a short essay here.

Listen NOW to the new 90&9 PODCAST!

Brand spankin' new and fresh out 'the box comes an exclusive 90&9 podcast article by Lance Reed this week. Okay, so Spiderman III made 59 million but the last time I checked none of the proceeds made it to my bank account. But Mr. Reed took the time not only to write a great thought down, but also to record it so that you and I could be inspired on this Monday morning. I already shared it with my wife and she was inspired as well. So why wait...click now!

Hey Mom! You're worth $$138,095!
Thanks to alert reader The "V", I now have an updated actuarial value of a stay-at-home Mom's worth for all the jobs she does at home. Amazing. Booger-wiping, though, was not mentioned as one of her duties.

The (not so) Great TV Debate

As promised, here is the stu take on the ninetyandnine.com question of TV in our organization. I'll morph into each group, one at a time so as not to confuse anyone, and answer the way I would answer were I addressing that particular group. So first is...

Reluctant Progressives

1. When television and the internet become more fully integrated, how will the UPCI deal with this technological reality if something like TV advertising is not adopted now?

Moi: So here I sit as a reluctant progressive, or should I say, the lukewarm group, and according to scripture, the vomitus. To answer question #1, my focus is on the concept of advertising. When TV and internet fuse in the future as one, the consumer will be able to pick-and-choose which programs to watch and will pay a small fee for the service. There will be advertising scattered about during the show, evident by the mini-mercials I must endure now when watching a brief web video or music video.

Vous: As a reminder to you, the proper name for TV is commercial television, the full meaning of which implies that the show is sponsored by the shine. We immediately get ourselves into hot water if we intend to sponsor TV shows, and to remain neutral, and could perhaps offer to sponsor the Emergency Broadcast Signal, BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP with rainbow screen. Else, we could broadcast on the Shopping Channel(s) and provide a tool-free number for patrons to receive a free book or something.

Home spun? Advertising was replaced by the concept of marketing a decade or so back, and to blindly launch into TV advertising without a marketing plan and study is to invite failure. Which leads me back to the concept that TV is commercial, it is big business, it is researched, evaluated, and launched only after professionals with degrees have tested it on select study markets. Otherwise, what you get is a haphazard local 30 second piece on Maybell's Diner, featuring grinning, masticating folks stating, on camera, "Mmm-mmm gotta get me some Maybell's!"

For the Short-Attention-Span: The beauty of the internet, as evidenced by the explosive popularity of youtube, is that anyone can broadcast whatever. This is what both frightens and relieves network executives at the same time about fusing networks with the internet: programming will become cheaper to the consumer, while becoming at the same time more ridiculous. They're seeing that what was once a mystery for finding and keeping audiences to watch their new fall prime time selections is no longer that, the answer being that the American fun threshold has been lowered to a new low, that is, the bottom, when considering that folks are watching as many hours (or more) of grainy youtube movies of a guy grinding his skateboard down a handrail until (whoops!) he lands on his personal region, as they are CSI.

I conclude: So, this same understanding by network executives can be translated to our organization, when trying to find our place in the future of TV joining hands with television: If you film it, they will watch. Armed with immediate-gratification mouse, the American public happily clicks on and off in an instant whatever entertains them for whatever brief (president's speech) or long (lonelygirl15) viewing they desire. The trick is to discover what holds the attention of the average American mouse clicker. He who learns that secret rules the TV/internet-fused world.

Stu Answers TV Questions Later Today
I will answer all the tv questions put forth by our fair editor in a challenging article at 90&9.com. Stand by...for news! Okay, Paul Harvey I'm not. Even close. So check back later.

Caffeined?
To all of you alert House Call Readers® I provide you with yet another caffeine article, since my freezing friend in the North of America thought it was time. This one is from National Geographic and is part of a whole, but makes a brief statement that is relevant about caffeine: it is the world's most popular psychoactive drug. The world's. And with that I say that those run-of-the-mill press releases about caffeine generally are in favor, no doubt supplied by the caffeine industry. Seriously.