The Advanced Art of Petty Vandalism

Busted
Every good A/P has two stories. The great practical joke where you escaped justice, and the great practical joke where you got caught. Points are accumulated for conquests depending on the degree of risk required for the target. For example, if you roll a house where the residents are known to chase would-be pranksters down the driveway with a shotgun, that’s obviously more impressive than a run-of-the-mill prank.

Tsk, Tsk
One California lady just became the Mecca of all rolling conquests. After her lawn was rolled, Katja Base tracked grocery store purchases, watched surveillance videos, and eventually nailed the six teens responsible. I congratulate her detective work but warn her that she has now unwittingly become the Golden Egg for every high school student on the West Coast. To roll her house and get away with it would be like climbing Everest. Be prepared Katja, the party is only just beginning.

Rolling 101
My secret is to roll a house when the resident is out of town. It’s a zero on the risk factor, but it sure makes for the most impressive results you can imagine. Of course the sad part is that somehow my sins still tend to find me out. In one classic example, as payback, the clever resident retaliated by posting for sale signs all over our 20,000 student college campus for my car (which was NOT for sale). He definitely had the last laugh.

P.s. – Where I’m from, we call it “rolling”, but I see many “TP” references elsewhere. Have we discovered another dialect anomaly?

P.s.s. – This post is a “do as I say, not as I do” entry. Do not try this at home, kids.

Other Offbeat News
An Ohio waitress carded a patron and was handed her very own ID which had been stolen three weeks earlier. What are the odds? Someone get this lady to buy me a lottery ticket. I’m kidding.