Bring on the Weekend!

Howdy, boys and girls. Ye ol’ blogger is off for a fun-filled night on the ol’ camp grounds. That’s right, it’s camp meeting time! The Louisiana District UPCI has been holding camp meetings since 1948, citing Dr. Vinson Synan’s assertion that it is the longest-running camp in America.

I’ve been in a responsible mood lately, which means I’ve been grown-up and boring, thanks to post-college, real-job life. So I almost considered not going for the first time in my formative Apostolic social bunny years. But the illusion of “camp” beckoned greater.

I’m excited. I said I wasn’t going to eat today so I could fit into my dress. I made it till 9:04 a.m.

I know this year is going to be great. However, I am all too familiar with last year’s brush with reality. I wrote this when I got home from camp last year:

Signs You're Getting Too Old for Camp Meeting

1. For the first time you consider going to the main camp meeting services rather than the youth services across town.
2. You keep catching yourself beginning sentences with "I remember back in the day..."
3. You are at first frustrated with the "Yes, ma'ams" over and over from all the little rugrats until you realize your old authority-figure status redeems you from practical jokes in the hotel.
4. You actually lock your hotel room now instead of throwing open the door for the weekend and putting a sign in the hall directing folks to “Le Par-tay.”
5. The only thing you invaded at the “Invade the Mall” social was the no. 7 "La Chimichanga Dinner" at El Rodeo.
6. People don't call your room after 11 p.m. because they know you're in bed.
7. One of the youth committee members suggests you join the fun at the Ramada for the Singles event.
8. You actually didn’t exceed the hotel occupancy level for your room! Gone are the days of 12 to a room (seriously), and crawling over bodies to get in the five-people-deep line to the community bathroom.
9. You spend the whole weekend (when you're not asleep) making sure the younger ones from your church have lunch money, rides, curler pins, towels, and yes, toilet paper.

Even Better News
Yesterday I bemoaned the lack of good news in the world. Today I will counter that by sharing 5 positive stories.

1. Unemployment is down to its lowest in almost 4 years.

2. The market is up because of the employment report.

3. America’s deficit is in better shape than expected.

4. At G8, $50 billion was pledged to Africa. Perhaps you have mixed feelings on the issue, but at least that shows apathy has not completely paralyzed the globe.

5. And there are still good people out there.

In Closing
The globe is reeling over the London blasts. I think we all were instantly overwhelmed with 9/11 flashbacks, and it’s not hard for Americans to imagine what Londoners are feeling right now. In this age of global terror, we must harbor hope that evil forces can be conquered by the power of those united for good. God bless Great Britain.

Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!

I am a C-H-R-I-S-T-I-A-N

Early Childhood Memories of an Apostolic
I should tell you now (make that warn you now) that I'm a compulsive top-tenner. I like to make stupid lists. Wendy and I both read the same blog last night, and she has posted a hilarious “You Might Be Apostolic If.” I actually thought back to some of my earliest church memories, and here’s my take based on the way we youngsters process it all.

Top 10 early childhood memories for your typical Apostolic:

1. Perhaps no mixed bathing, but definitely the ritual baptismal of any and all animals stupid enough to be still long enough for you to get your hands on them.
   
2. The cheap “ring” cookies in Sunday School… you know the kind you put on your fingers?
   
3. Sleeping under the pews.
   
4. Dodging high-heels and bobby pins on Sunday nights before falling asleep under the pews.
   
5. First concept of multi-media: reading the Sunday funnies while listening to a Vestal Goodman record in your non-TV home.
   
6. Oh the thrill of "stonewashed" blue jean skirts!
   
7. Having a victory march the Sunday Wal-Mart came to town.
   
8. Having a breakdown the day you came home from school and Mom wasn’t there so you thought you’d missed the rapture.
   
9. 21 words for you: "I'm a One-God, Apostolic, tongue-talking, holy roller, born again, heaven-bound, believer in the liberating power of Jesus name...”
   
10. Gals: swapping badges at youth camp with a boy who had a side spike and/or bowl cut. Guys: being begged by 9* gals with poofs and stonewashed blue jean jumpers to swap badges.
    *based on the usual 9:1 guy-girl ratio in Apostolic congregations

The News
Between the Idaho girl and the terrorist bombings in London, it’s a challenge today to find some good news. And even though I promised to be simple and positive, it bothers me that in this world, there is so much evil. I suppose since we Christians know Christ’s teachings about good and evil, we should not be shocked when malicious things happen. But it’s still appalling. Days like today make it hard to believe in an innate goodness in human nature.

And still in the middle of it all, the headlines would just as soon gossip about Holmes/Cruise and Jolie/Pitt. How bout they make a movie where Mr. and Mrs. Smith are hired to assassinate Batman’s girl until an ordinary Joe escaping aliens convinces the foursome to join forces to fight the paparazzi.

Better News
Today was the running of the bulls! This year officials used an anti-slip spray on some of the more dangerous areas of the course. ….Now com’on! That really takes all of the fun out of it. If they have to slip-proof the cobblestones, I say they toss a bone to us folks who just watch it to see people get trampled. How ‘bout a 3-Mississippi running start for the bulls?

And in my promise to make fun of people taking themselves/life too seriously, check out (not literally) these nude protesters. Now I guess because my family raises animals (my shameless plug for the week), I’ve always had a hard time understanding animal rights advocates. But a nude protest of the running of the bulls? I’m an English major and I can’t even find the symbolism here.

Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!

Twinkletoes

Over the weekend I participated in my first foot-washing. I’m twenty-neveryoumind, but somehow I had never been to a foot-washing. The logistics of the whole thing has been a challenge for our church. But we had a ladies meeting with the incomparable Sis. Vonnie Lopez, and we were able to spread out in the main sanctuary to facilitate all the people. It was a great night of prayer, preaching, worship, communion, and certainly not last nor least--foot-washing. It was incredible.

I have to tell you that I was a little scared of the foot-washing thing. I’m self-diagnosed borderline OCD, so the idea of touching other people’s toe cheese turns my tummy. Turns out there was none of the scrub-between-the-toes action I had imagined. In fact, it was more like foot-rinsing if you want to get technical about it. The physical aspect of it is just a gesture of humility. It’s not literally an attempt to scrub down your buddy’s feet. So there was no grossness at all.

What it was was humbling. It was done in a time of prayer, and it was a very beautiful experience. We prayed for each other with such humility and sincerity. As ladies finished, we went around and prayed with others. Not only could we feel a special presence of God, but there was also a spirit of unity in the sanctuary unlike anything else I’ve ever felt.

So here’s my question: given how awesome this is, why isn’t it observed more frequently? Is this too old-school for the church of today?

What You’ve All Been Waiting For…
Check out this site for some special fashion ideas, all thanks to the gift that keeps on giving: duct tape!

Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!

The Tempest, The Thrifty, and Those Who Love Neon

It Is a Dark and Stormy Night
I’m listening to the re-re-re-re-mix of “Shout to the Lord” and waiting for Tropical Storm Cindy in my car in the parking lot of a coffee shop that fortunately has a decent wireless connection. Don’t tell my Mom, but there’s a man that keeps walking back and forth down the sidewalk in a neon shirt. I find this interesting because I was just thinking that no one wears neon these days.

So this is the first storm of the season to blow our way. In the spirit of hurricane preparedness, I thought I would share my favorite hurricane moment. You see, around here, hurricanes are like the villains you love to hate. My friends in the North get snow days; we get hurricane days.

There was the time we were supposed to get a hurricane, but it weakened near landfall and showed up a disappointing Tropical Depression. So we threw an impromptu “Tropical Depression Party.” When that lulled we grabbed the camcorder (to watch later on our "monitors", of course) and filmed a spoof of all the horrible Weather Channel live hurricane coverage we’d ever seen. We did it up right, I mean to tell you. We even made one friend don rain slicker, umbrella, and pretend microphone (yes we used duct tape to make it). We turned on shop fans, shook trees in the background, and hosed her down as she gave her report. It was great. Almost as entertaining as listening to national news anchors try to pronounce rural Louisiana Coastal towns like Des Allemands or Pointe a la Hache or Calcasieu Parish....

We’re grown up now, and we’d rather wait this one out from the comfort of sound sleep. Some things never change though—just like in the days of praying for cancelled classes, this finds us all hoping by some divine miracle that Cindy will get bad enough for work to be cancelled. Not likely. We’ll just drive to work in ten inches of flood waters and 70 mph winds and wonder why insurance in Louisiana is so expensive.

Where's M-Diddy When You Need Her?
I find especially entertaining that French President Chirac got caught griping about British chow on the eve of landmark meetings to save starving people in Africa. Lay off our friends across the pond, Jacques. Let's just feed the hungry. I don't know, send some cheese to Africa or something if you know food so well. We'll send over M-Diddy (aka Martha Stewart) if you don't watch it. (I'm so resisting a "let them eat cake" line right now.) More about G8 later…

Did You Know…
On this day in 1865, William Booth started what would become the Salvation Army. I find this relevant because over the weekend I was in a search-and-rescue-mission mood and went thrift store shopping. I rescued a sign for the kitchen in our cozy (translation=small) apartment my two friends and I share. The sign: “Kissing not allowed in kitchen unless the cook participates.” My Mom upon entering the thrift store and noticing some “gently used” items: “You mean this stuff isn’t new?” …New to you, Mom. New to you.

Song of the Week
I’m praying any minute now that “All My Praise” by Selah will come on. It is my fave of the moment (with Chris Tomlin's "The Song of Heaven" a close second). There’s something about the combination of the lyrics and the building chord progression in the bridge. They should have done the bridge in the radio version about sixteen times in true Pentecostal fashion. But even still, it’s a great song, and if it comes on, I might even invite neon shirt man over to share in my joy. Here’s the lyrics to the bridge:

You made every star/
And You taught it how to shine/
You knew my name before there was time/
And all this was just part of Your glorious design/
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Long live duct tape! Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!

Liberty and Justice For All

Happy Fourth of July! Today Americans celebrate Independence Day. I hope this finds everyone safe and enjoying a fun time with family and friends.

This is a good time to reflect on this young nation's plight for liberty. Have you read the Declaration of Independence lately? It reminds us of America's thesis statement:

"that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with
certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit
of Happiness"

I'm thankful for a country that recognizes the Creator and that is founded to give men and women a chance to pursue these unalienable rights.

I'm also thankful for the many brave patriots who have defended America in centuries past, and I'm reminded now of the soldiers currently on foreign soils. Today I received a prayer request from a mother who found out her son has been wounded in Falujah. I feel for her and the many others whose loved ones are in harm's way to protect us. Let us pray for our troops on this day and always. God bless America!

Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!

Name That Justice

The Supreme Court Shuffleboard
The overwhelming current event is the Supreme Court fracas and Justice O'Connor's decision to step down. I will begin with a disclaimer that I don't keep up with politics, so don't demand brilliant insight. In a way, though, this is more of a legal/government issue. But then where is the line between government and politics? Someone once said life is politics. Regardless, I do recognize that this is a significant and far-reaching legal juncture facing our nation. Not to mention, there are a lot of important cases on next year's docket.

O'Connors Service
There is something to be said for Justice O'Connor's very bold service. Of course we all know that she was the first woman to serve on the Supreme Court, but she was also a very important swing vote in several major cases. In the words of President Bush: "For an old ranching girl, you turned out pretty good." Hats off to Justice O'Connor for swinging with both fists.

You're How Old?
And I'm also going to go out on a limb and say hats off to Justice O'Connor for retiring while still in good health. I don't want to disrespect the outstanding service records of present justices, but is there any possibility at all of an age cap? Conceivably we could see justices in their nineties on the bench. Not only might an elder justice have trouble bridging generational gaps, but what's the recourse if their health/mental capabilities become questionable? With a life tenure the legality in forcing a justice out would be shaky. The role they play in our judicial system is too crucial to be jeapordized. Does it bother anyone besides me that guaranteeing the faculties of the decision-makers in highest legal court in the land is a gray issue?

The Hopefuls
Check out this list of speculative replacements for O'Connor. I'm glad to see such diversity. My main hope is that all parties involved will try to work together and think of the long-term good of the nation--not just partisan politics.

In reference to my goal of keeping it simple, I add commentary from a friend (who's weary of it all) regarding the debate over Bush's decision: "He's the president for crying out loud. Just do what he says. Let him pick whoever he wants and get over it." I'm trying to keep my goal of being positive, but I foresee the possiblity of a long, vicious battle over the appointment. We could be "getting over it" for a long time.

Names in the News
The music world has lost Luther Vandross at age 54.
Venus Williams has won a thrilling Wimbeldon victory.
Lance Armstrong is living strong and looking promising for a 637,295th Tour de France win.

Because I Love You...
I want to share the incredulity, the magic, the awe of the unique gift to mankind commonly referred to as duct tape. Occasionally (translation = when I run out of meaningful things to share), I will relate a personal duct tape testimony, such as the time I repaired my car with duct tape and the time my friend gave me a duct tape handbag. In the meantime, here are other exciting stories about the greatness that is duct tape.

Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!