A Lady's Dilemma (a.k.a Nothing Is Sacred When it Comes to Potential Blogfodder)
I returned home from work on Monday night and sitting on my computer desk was a guy's name and phone number.
"This guy was over at your aunt's house today," my mother said, "and your cousin showed him a picture of you, and he was interested in meeting you. So he gave me his phone number to give to you and said for you to call him so you could do lunch together."
I looked at the paper dubiously. "Did he seem like a creep?" I asked. I am such a creep magnet.
"No, no, he was cute," my mom replied hastily. "And he seemed really nice. He and the Hunting Freak were there, and he was all dressed up to take him out for his birthday."
I digested that for a moment. That was definitely a point in his favor. Most people aren't too kind to Hunting Freak.
"His dad was a pastor down here somewhere," continued the voice of a woman who is skilled at giving someone the third degree, "and then they moved to Washington, D.C., but he moved back down here to work, and I'm not sure he knows too many people down here now. He seemed kind of shy.
"I told him I'd give you his number," she continued, "but I told him you probably wouldn't call since you're not the type of girl to call guys. Oh, he's a year older than you."
Another point in his favor. After Dimples, I swore I'd never date a younger guy. A hard promise to keep, since most of the decent guys I meet nowadays are 19 and under.
So now I'm sitting here staring at this piece of paper, and I must confess, as a girl who hasn't been on a date in over a year, I'm feeling sorely tempted.
On the other hand, I am old-fashioned and very Rules oriented when it comes to guys. I don't chase them, I don't pursue them, I don't initiate relationships with them.
On the other hand, a blind date with a perfect stranger could be just the thing to spice up my very boring life.
On the other hand, (there is no other hand!) I am quite satisfied with my stress-free life, and I'm sure that would change dramatically should a guy get entangled in it.
On the other hand (I am going to look like the Hindu goddess Kali here in a minute with all these hands) I do enjoy the company of guys, and it's been almost two months since I last hung out with some of them in any sort of in-depth way.
On the other hand, I am really not into breaking guys' hearts or having my own messed with, and that's always a scary potential when it comes to guy/girl relations. Nor am I into having a string of short, emotional attachments. At 25, playing the field isn't nearly as fun as it was at 18.
On the other hand, I am always up for the chance to make a new friend, something I have precious few of down here . . .
So I've decided to consult you, my wise, insightful and always supportive blogging audience. Should I ditch the pro/con analysis and just give him a call already? Or should I chuck this piece of paper and figure if it's God's will that we'll meet up somehow anyway without my having to do anything?
I'll go with whatever you guys decide! That way, I can, Pontius-Pilate style, totally absolve myself from the decision-making and have a scapegoat to blame should things go badly. Cool, huh? Let the advice-giving godly counsel commence!
Questions, comments, concerns? Please feel free to E-mail me!
posted by 99 Blogger @ 5:59 PM
11 comments
11 Comments:
My wife went "ugh" when she heard about him leaving a message for you to call him. Wait and see if he is interested enough to call you. But then, we're a little old-fashioned and we've been married for almost 18 years so it's not like either of us are feeling any desperation. My wife just commented "You're bad" concerning that last sentence. She said to ask “Where's the chivalry in his approach?”
I'm with anonymous. Leaving a message is a little cocky. Who knows? Maybe he needs you to leave him a message on a piece of paper "I don't call guys."
Maybe he will get the point.
Call him! What could it hurt? He's new in town. You're lonesome. Who knows? Maybe this IS God's way of having you meet. Or-get your Mom to call and invite him over for dinner.
Call him! It'll be fun and if it works out -- wonderful. But if it doesn't, you'll have another great "Wendy story"...and those are fun too. :) Plus it could give you at least 5 good blog entries this month: The Phone Call, The Deciding what to WEAR essay, The Nerves BEFORE the Date, The DATE and then the Aftermath. See? You should just do it for the fans...
Hehe
(with a wrinkled brow and oh so wise look) My dear Wendy, here is my advice.
Give him a call. You could even let him know right off the bat that you usually don't call guys, but since he was new in town, you thought he could use a friend. I know I don't have to worry with you, but honesty is always the best policy.
This could just be a thing, or it could be a God thing. But remember that God helps those who help themselves =)
Call him! Life is too short not to take chances now and then. He's shy and "new" in the area, he's probably not going to call you. Good guys are too hard to find, you just may have found one.
Ok, so he left a note for you. At least it was with your mother, Chalk up point #1. He is going by a photo of you, and I know for a fact you never like your photos, Chalk in point #2. And finally I like the idea by the other anonymous, have mom call and invite him over for dinner with the family to meet and greet without the awkward one on one issue. Also, Dads opinion always weighs allot with you Miss Fabulous, so this way you get a family scope and then the ball will be in his corner to call you for the next move. Otherwise you have run out of hands, and will be growing a prehencil tail next if you don't deal with the male/female issue already. Besides he is not from around here and beleive me that is the next 8 chalk points on the list.
NO offense meant for the locals. It's just that small towns can always use new blood and new personalities. Otherwise we all become stagnant. So call Mom, (who already appears a little impressed) she did bring you his number, and have her set it up. Besides that will really give you points with your family and possibly with him.
How about copying this blog entry, with all the comments, and then mailing it to him. If he survives that, then maybe he will get the hint that he should call you.
Having your mom call him and invite him over for dinner is a set-up, but at least it didn't come directly from you.
If, at dinner, you decide you really would rather not have any further contact with him, you can always belch loudly and then give a little hysterical laugh. Chances are he will be scared off. If he isn't, then maybe you really will have to worry!
stu says:
Don't call, that's all. Your aunt probably pumped him up with info about you, so if he's interested, he'll call. If he doesn't call, pat yourself on the back and say to yourself, "Ah, he was probably just a serial killer or sump'n."
I think you should call him. Maybe part of the reason he left a message for you to call him instead of him being the chivalrous one and calling you is not because he's cocky, but maybe because he's a little shy, as your mom said he seemed.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to spice things up a little bit. (As long as it's not with habanero sauce, cuz that stuff is so spicy it literally hurts!) See where it goes. There's some saying that somebody said somewhere about "it is better to regret something you did than to regret something you didn't do." Something like that. Well, anyway, my 2 cents has been officially thrown in!
He could be a great guy, but his style is lacking some luster. If he's that insecure about whether you would be interested in him that he's left the ball in your court to call him...
Don't let his insecurity force you to be brazen.
He can figure out how to contact you. If he needs a little encouragement, just let the right people know you'd enjoy getting to know him. It'll get back to him, and in a lady like fashion, the ball will be back in his court, where it belongs.
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