First Impressions

Hey! I'm Laura Payne... new blogger and new big fan of Notes.

I type this, my first, blog with fear and trepidation (LOVE that word) over the whole process. Do you go for the "deep thoughts with LP" route? Or the lighthearted glimpse into your quirky side? Or jump on the conversational bandwagon and interact with everybody else?

It's like that "first day of high school choir" syndrome. You don't want to earn any un-welcomed labels by singing TOO loud or TOO soft or seeming TOO eager...

An unnamed friend and I were labeled the "opera twins" our freshman year of Bible School. I think we were the only two true sopranos in the bunch and thus got pigeon-holed for 1st Soprano every time Wayne Goodine got inspired to do another selection from Handel's Messiah. Our glorious wailing "...and He shall reign..!!!" earned us the honors. My friend, who is now a pastor's wife and has no musical reputation to defend, gets a kick out of that recollection. I, personally, have encountered too much spectacular music in the world to be proud of that!

So, you see. first impressions are important. No one wants to be pegged as one of the "opera twins."

I think about these things when visitors walk into my church. I hope that they are catching us on a good day. Or that the powerful moments of worship were so dynamic that they drowned out the musical blemishes. I'm fighting quality control issues all over the place! It's the challenge of a growing, emerging church environment. In the middle of my unadulterated, free worship to my Creator, I glance at my 3rd row of Sopranos and get SO annoyed at the blah expressions and almost-closed mouths I see! As I'm telling God how much more He deserves than that... I'm interrupted by a random wrong chord on the organ.

As I'm leaving the Sunday service, the warm smiles and comments about how great our music department is doesn't shut-up Mr. Quality Control from yapping messages in the back of my brain.

On Monday I found out that one of our visitors last Wednesday night was a regular singer for Benny Hinn ministries! Argh! Don't get me wrong. I am not star struck nor do I feel that I have anything to prove. However, the whole "first impressions" game started in my mind: "Too bad the whole band didn't play." "Did the song selection seem a bit blah?" etc.. etc..

In those amazing moments of worship where God reveals Himself once again to be sovereign, I don't analyze quality too much. But I also believe that it is God's gifting in action to work towards perfection and excellence. God does care about my first, and second, and third impression. So I continue wrestling. I'm really looking forward to the day when I can quiet Mr. Quality Control for good. One day, with the perfect set of musicians and the perfect group of singers I will be able to worship freely and know that, without any effort, it all sounds perfect. That will be heaven. Literally.

In the meantime, I'm trying to enjoy the journey. Kind of like this blog. I may never create the perfect post, but I want to have fun in the process. Hopefully this first impression doesn't earn me any nicknames. Hey. If we meet in person, please don't call me the "opera twin."
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I am Laura (Demos) Payne... Creative Arts and Music Pastor at Goodlettsville Pentecostal Church, pastored by Tim Zuniga in the Nashville, TN area. My husband and I moved here in March 2007. I spent 9 years as the Dean of Music at Christian Life College in Stockton, CA and then taught part-time for another year and a half. I am a mom to three amazing boys (7, 5 and 3). I have a Masters in Music Education from University of the Pacific and two bachelor degrees, also in music.

I grew up in Athens, Greece (MK) and speak Greek and German. My husband is a Licensed Minister and a Marriage and Family Therapist. He's VERY cool.... and my strength and balance in life.

I would like to pretend that I have a million facinating and meaningful hobbies, like mountain climbing, scrapbooking, playing violin and researching ancient Greek texts, but the truth is my life is TOO busy to do any of the above, even though I'd love to! One day...