Collideoscope

Posted by: David Bunch

We awoke yesterday morning to sunshine, and what a welcome site that was! Although it's hot and some places in the Baton Rouge area still have no electricity, we do not feel as though we are experiencing any difficulty at all when we see the absolute devastation in New Orleans and other regions of the Gulf Coast.

We concentrate a lot on New Orleans, but Mississippi took a direct hit and parts of Alabama are not unaffected.

The situation in New Orleans is dire, however, because as Brad pointed out it is one large, concrete bowl or swimming pool holding waters that continue to rise. Please pray that this disaster will be mitigated as much as possible. The Bible instructs us to pray for those in authority, and now is a good time to heed that advice. They need wisdom to make the right decisions.

Bro. Danny Smith is director of Compassion services International (CSI), which is the UPCI's response team to disasters worldwide. They recently did a tremendous job in the areas affected by the tsunamis. Here's what he has to say:

Many UPCI churches and constituents were seriously impacted throughout lower
Louisiana, MS and AL. Initial reports are that one MS church is totally
destroyed. Tonight we are gathering our resources to launch a Compassion
Services
International Emergency Relief project. Therefore, Bro. Haney and
Bro. Howell
have ordered an immediate initiative by CSI. I am opening a
command post here
in an office at our Denham Springs church. Our church is
one of the few
buildings in the parish that has electricity. We will send
out assessment teams
and need to raise substantial funds to provide
assistance to victims of the
disaster.

Please pray for three things:
1) For the victims
2) For CSI; that we can be a blessing and big help to
thousands and that we
can raise enough funds to do what needs to be done.
3) That we can get our electricity back on SOON.

We are setting up
the UPCI website to take your secure online credit card
contributions.

Last night we had an emergency CSI meeting in Denham Springs. We are
ramping
up for the CSI SMART Team to strike out by tomorrow for a 5-7 day
assessment
trip throughout all the affect areas of LA, MS, AL, FL. We will
come back
with a comprehensive report as to how we all can get involved and
provide
assistance to the victims. Our focus is to provide immediate relief
to our
churches, pastors and their constituents; then to others. We are
setting up a
warehouse in Denham Springs to receive donated goods such as
water, food, tarps,
tents and other emergency items. Then, we need to raise
funds to help expedite
all this.

As soon as I have additional information, I will provide the link to the secure online site where you can send your contributions, and ways to possibly send dry goods and provisions to those areas affected most.

Thank most of all for your prayers.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Those of us who live Southern Louisiana have all heard talk of The Big One that may hit someday and what it would do to New Orleans. Truthfully, even though I lived in New Orleans for two years, I've always thought the talk was a little overblown and thought (or hoped) I wouldn't see it in my lifetime. Well, The Big One has hit and it is everything people talked about and more.

Even though the eye of Hurricane Katrina passed a little to the east of New Orleans, the city is still devastated. At least one levee along a canal has broken, letting the water from Lake Ponchartrain rush into the city. Since New Orleans sits below sea level and surrounded on all sides by water, the city is acting as a bowl to flood waters. Some parts of the city have 20 feet of standing water and it is still rising as I type this.

To get the full affect of the catastrophe, read the up-to-the minute news being posted on the Times Picayune website (New Orlean's main newspaper).

Luckily, Baton Rouge fared much better. We have quite a few trees and power lines down, but no flooding. Most of the town still has no electricity (I'm blogging from work with a generator running) but that is a small price to pay compared to what could have been.

Watching an aerial video of the New Orleans area after Katrina, I had the same helpless feeling I had after 9-11. Although there won't be nearly as many lives lost (most people heeded the mandatory evacuation), the destruction to the city will be felt for a long, long time. Most places will have no electricity for over a month and a lot of people will have to totally rebuild their homes.

Please say a prayer for everyone that Katrina has affected and help out by donating to the Red Cross or other relief funds.

Posted by: David Bunch

I'm writing to you now from the top secret super secure hurricane headquaters of the ninetyand nine Southern command. Okay, actually I'm on my parents computer taking advantage of the precious final hours before Hurricane Katrina and what will probably be days without power. My wife, niece, and I could have ridden this one out at home, but there is something comforting about going to Mom and Dad's house during a crisis!

We're in Baton Rouge, and if everything goes as forecasted, we'll get tropical storm force winds starting tomorrow (Monday) with gusts up to 70 mph (considered hurricane strength). We solicit your prayers, but especially prayer is needed for the New Orleans area. The will get the full forecasted 165 mph hurricane with storm surges up to 20 feet. To place that in perspective, we just heard an official say that if you lived in a 2 story house, that would not be high enough to get you above the rising waters. This is primarily due to the fact that New Orleans is below sea level.

For those of you who have met lots of South LA folks thru quizzing, Youth Congress, etc., when we say New Orleans we mean Kenner, Metairie, Slidell, LaPlace, etc. There are millions of precious people in these areas and of course many brothers and sisters in Christ. Most will have evacuated at this point, but many will return to absolutely nothing. Please pray!

The words to an old dc Talk song keep going thru my mind:

YOU ride the storm
Endure the pain
YOU comfort me in my hurricane
And I'll never be alone again
(From Minds Eye)

We will get to trust God thru a literal hurricane in the next 24 hours.

We take comfort in the fact that Christ looked at the storm the disciples faced in the New Testament and addressed it as "Peace". HE said, "Peace, be still". God looks at chaos and calls it peace.

And that's enough to give me peace.

Posted by: David Bunch

The French are lousy losers! A French newspaper that gained access to some of Lance's stored urine samples says that he used the illegal drug EPO during 1999, the year he first won the Tour de France.

L'Equipe said traces of EPO had been found on six different occasions in
Armstrong's 1999 urine samples by the national doping testing laboratory of
Châtenay-Malabry near Paris. EPO can boost performance by as much as 20
percent.

In rebutting the allegations, Armstrong makes an interesting point.

"We could look at a lot of things," he added. "If you consider the landscape
between Americans and French right now, obviously relations are strained. Let's
not forget this all began in 1999 when I won my first Tour... a lot of
insinuations, a lot of slimey journalism."

The political side of me wants to buy into this theory. There has been a political, govermental and social feud between America and France since the War on Terror began. It is entirely plausible to me that they simply cannot accept the success of an American, especially one who conquered their competition in their country.

The discussion about Lance and illegal substances is likely to go on for some time. It will be interesting to see how it turns out. But until more credible evidence comes forth, I'm siding with the American.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Since dBunch brought up a bad guy in sports, I had to counter his attack with some good guys!

The Sporting News selects 99 "Good Guys in Sports" each year and this year the Kansas City Chiefs had four players on this "team." All of them are pretty good football players, too. The top "good guy" is Warrick Dunn, a player who grew up in my hometown, Baton Rouge. I think I've mentioned him before and he is truly a class act.

Kansas City Chiefs QB Trent Green, TE Tony Gonzalez, FB Tony Richardson, and G Will Shields have all been named by The Sporting News (TSN) some of the top “Good Guys in Sports.” For the fifth consecutive year, TSN selected 99 athletes in the five major sports who are dedicated to civic responsibility and character. The publication also acknowledges the top overall individuals in each of their respective sports. All of the athletes were chosen because they exhibited a big heart, they cared more about others than themselves, and they spent both time as well as money in a commitment to the community through their acts of charity. The top Good Guy in sports is the Atlanta Falcons Warrick Dunn. The feature naming the athletes appears in TSN’s special July 8th issue that is on sale now.

Posted by: David Bunch

This is great! Now that Tiger Woods has another win under his belt, everyone has restored confidence in him.

Now for the scary part. Woods has his mojo back. All of it and more. I'm talking about his big stick -- the driver. It was his most fearsome weapon ever since he burst into professional golf. He simply overpowered Augusta National with his length to win his first Masters back in 1997 (much the same way Jack Nicklaus did in the first half of his career). He refined the rest of his game as time passed and basically demoralized the world's finest golfers for a couple of years because he was not only blasting it 30, 40 and sometimes even more yards off the tee, he worked until he was one of the best chippers, bunker players and putters on tour. That's how he won the Tiger Slam -- those four consecutive major championships -- and became only the player worthy of being mentioned in the same sentence as Nicklaus.

Yep. We're talking about the same Tiger that didn't look so scary just a few months back. The one all of the talking heads said was not so unbeatable after all.

During his slump in 2003 and 2004, part of the problem was that Woods was no longer among the game's biggest hitters. He stubbornly stuck to his old-technology clubs -- a 43.5-inch driver with a steel shaft and a small head, and a normal ball. He disdained the newest gear and why not? The old stuff won the Grand Slam. But as Woods's game began to slip shortly after he parted ways with instructor Butch Harmon in mid-2002, his problems were compounded by the fact that he was driving it crooked and not as long as other players.

Well, it appears he's made a believer out of them.

That makes this next prediction easier than selling Paris Hilton a $2,000 handbag: Woods is poised to dominate again next year. And by that, I mean, pretty much the way he dominated in 2000 and '01. Look, he went into this year with serious swing issues, changed his swing and still won five times, including two majors, and reasserted total control of the No. 1 spot in the world rankings.

Methinks he's definitely in the same category as Nicklaus, and I believe we'll see the day that his accomplishments on the course pale in comparison to Tiger's.

Posted by: David Bunch

Well. Dwight Gooden has been arrested again for DUI. And he has a pending domestic violence charge as well. Truly, this is getting so old. I mean, Dwight was such a talented ball player back in the day. I can remember going through baseball cards in the seventh grade locker room and trying to do whatever it took to get a sweet deal on the Gooden cards.

The 1984 Rookie of the Year and the 1985 NL Cy Young Award winner while with the New York Mets, Gooden went 194-112 with a 3.51 ERA before retiring in 2001. He also pitched for the Yankees, Cleveland Indians, Houston Astros and Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

And then, out of no where, it was trouble with drugs. Then he gets rehabbed and comes back. Then it's more trouble. Are we surprised then to see that yet again the man is under the influence?

Gooden was arrested by Tampa police in 2002 on a drunken driving charge, but later pleaded guilty to reckless driving and received a year probation. He was arrested in March and charged with hitting his live-in girlfriend in the face during an argument.

During his playing days, Gooden was suspended for 60 days in 1994 for testing positive for cocaine while with the Mets. He tested positive for cocaine again while on suspension and was sidelined for the 1995 season.

It has been said before, I know, but allow me to vent for just a moment. These guys have no concept of the fact that young kids look up to them. What sorry role models most of them are. How could they not take the responsibility they have been given more seriously? Just today I heard about a football player for the New Orleans Saints who will miss several games because the coach is unhappy with him for missing pre-season practice. And why did he miss pre-season practice? Because he was serving a federal sentence on drug charges! Crikey!

I must say that I am glad Brad continues to find stories of the good guys in sports who are interested in making a difference in the lives of young people.

Posted by: David Bunch

The question has been posed, "are you the Bunch from Bunch n Breeze"?

As you'll note from my previously posted picture, I do not look like THAT Bunch, but Papa and Mama Bunch go to church with that Bunch and they joke a bunch about also being Bunch and I could get an autograph from that Bunch if you'd like....whatever.

I have often lamented the fact that Bunch n Breeze came up with the whole Bunch n Breeze thing, when all the time my name really is Bunch. I mean, my dad and my brother and I have some pretty good material (at least we think it is), and we could have toured the UPC with the whole comedy thing and been instant celebrities. But no.

This ranks right up there with the whole Pistol Pete thing.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

A few years back, I stumbled across an auction on ebay for some VHS tapes of old college basketball games of LSU when Pistol Pete played for the Tigers. Since he obviously is a local legend around here and I had only seen highlight reels of him in action, I jumped on the tapes.

After watching the two tapes, I realized exactly how special he was. I think he scored fifty points in both of the games ( he holds the NCAA career record for highest points per game average - 44.2 ppg) and some of the moves he made were unbelievable, especially in a time when going behind the back with the ball was unheard of. His ballhandling would embarrass even the And 1 street ballers.

Sorry to hear you "lost" your autograph, Dave. Somewhere over the years, I "acquired" an autograph of The Pistol. It's awesome...except it's kinda strange that he addressed it "To Dave." :)

Posted by: David Bunch

Be sure to check out the Survey Sez part of the webzine for readers' stories of their brush with the famous. It reminds me of my famous person story which also happens to be sports related.

When I was just a little fella, my parents and I were in a department store when the announcement came over the speakers that Pistol Pete Maravich was in the store signing autographs. Although I was too young to appreciate it at the time, my parents knew that this was an opportunity not to be missed. They quickly whisked my brother and me upstairs to the sporting goods department where The Pistol himself was sitting behind a table waiting to sign autographs. There was no line. My brother and I each got an autograph and a handshake. Later we noticed that Maravich had included a Bible Verse with his handwritten, personalized message.

It was just a short time later that Pistol Pete died an untimely death and the movie about his life came out (also called The Pistol). It was during the publicity from those two events that I really began to appreciate the legend of Pistol Pete and who he really was. I still enjoy going into the local bbq place, T.J. Ribs, and looking at all of the Maravich memorabilia (he played basketball locally for LSU).

My only regret? Through the many adventures of my life, I lost my autograph. My brother still has his, though. No doubt he'll cash it in for millions at some point in his life and not share a cent with me.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

The Little League World Series is taking place now in Williamsport, Pennsylvania as kids from all over the world battle for the world title. There's some regional interest here because a team from Lafayette, La. is in the final eight teams in the U.S. bracket. The winner of the U.S. bracket will play the survivor of the international bracket for the title.

I love watching the Little League World Series. It's an avenue back to my own youth, where eating, sleeping, and playing ball were the only important things. It's easy to feel the emotion that these kids go through, because it's displayed so prominently on their faces. The dismay of an error gives way to the joy of a base hit, just moments later. If you’re accustomed to watching the skill of MLB players, as I am, then there’s something oddly alluring to seeing a game where every hit ball is an adventure. As Brian Murphy says, it’s a “fascination with the fallible.”

It burns on my home TV, all morning, all day. NFL exhibitions can't touch it. Neither can big-league ball, a World Golf Championships event or NASCAR. My wife wonders about my sanity, questioning the need for daylong viewing.

"But," I protest, "it's the Little League World Series!"

She rolls her eyes, and heads to the exercise bike. I sink deeper into the couch, shouting at the kids to hit the cutoff man, be more selective at the plate and ignore the coach who thinks he's Walter Alston with a wireless mike. I wipe onion dip off my T-shirt. I am in sports heaven, in the heaven of an American late summer.

After all, it's the Little League World Series!

Why the obsession? I know my people at The Cooler understand where I'm coming from. It's a longing for my own past, and redemption for those eight straight walks I gave up to lose the Mill Valley (Calif.) Little League City Championship in 1979. It's the fascination with the fallible, where a shortstop and third baseman from Maine can gather underneath a can o' corn pop-up, then let it drop.

Posted by: David Bunch

And giving bMax his due as well. Here he is in his best "batta batta batta swing" stance at a nifty little baseball diamond in Greenwich Village (a separate trip than said basketball court discovery). I don't mean to keep referring to Greenwich Village so much, but I must tell you that Brad and I (and our respective lovely ladies) discovered much to pique our interest there with not only these sports finds, but also lots of literary and cultural flavor as well as a diverse crowd of street vendors. Most interesting was e e cummings' home at Patchin Place and his favorite restaurant, Chumley's. I have pictures of those but won't share them unless there is a public outcry. I'm waiting...waiting....waiting...okay, does anyone besides Brad and me even care where e e cummings hung out?

Posted by: David Bunch

Here's the pic that I referenced earlier...dBunch in the heart of Greenwich Village. The court is said to be the site where Kareem Abdul Jabar (and unnamed "others") were discovered by NBA talent scouts. I thought that if I stood there long enough someone might discover me, but as you may notice it was quite chilly with a drizzle of rain. So my wait was cut short. Ah well, there is always next time.

Posted by: David Bunch

Ah, bMax. I have schedule you for a psychiatric evaluation in the hopes that the psychiatrist can help you remember all of the dream. The ball bouncing off of your head? That was from a dBunch unleash-the-beast-backboard-swaying-game-delaying slam dunk!

No not really. Just in case you are wondering, the Bunch/McDonald trash talking days are in the rear view mirror. In fact, just to give credit where credit is due, ol Brad had a wicked left handed lay up that left me shaking my head in wonder many times.

Brad's story does remind me of our trip to NYC last spring. We found some street courts that, if my memory serves me well, the guide said were called the 8th Street courts. Much like the article Brad referenced, she said that NBA greats were first discovered on these courts-most notably Kareem Abdul Jabar. I know that the courts Brad referenced mentioned 8th street, but our find was in Greenwich Village and I'm pretty sure we were no where near 155th. Perhaps on our next excursion to The Big Apple we could seek out this particular court? Anyone with a knowledge of the street courts in NYC have any idea where this court was?

I did get my wife to take my picture in front of the 8th Street courts, and the film made it through the screening machines at the airport unscathed. It's one I'll always treasure. Is that Kareem I see lurking in the background?

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Last night, I dreamed that I was playing basketball at a famous New York City street court where people show up to see the local legends and even NBA players gather from time to time. I was a little intimidated at first, because there was quite a few people watching and I didn't know if I belonged. I finally hit a couple of jump shots and started to get in the groove, but then things went downhill. I fumbled a couple of passes and one even bounced off my head. People started to laugh and then I woke up.

I gotta work on my dreams. I'm supposed to be dunking on people when I dream of playing basketball!

Anyway, I was suprised to find this article on espn.com this morning that talks about Rucker Park in Harlem.

NEW YORK -- Walking into the playground at just after 2 p.m. Monday afternoon, things looked normal … and not so normal. There were swarms of kids riding the swings, chasing each other around. But there were also a couple large trailer trucks, a satellite dish, and a stage set up.

That's what happens when SportsCenter comes to town on its "50 States in 50 Days" tour.

But this isn't any old playground. In fact, Harlem's Holcombe Rucker Playground might be the most famous playground in America.

If you're a basketball fan, and you haven't heard of Rucker Park … well, you better go back to school.

A quick refresher course: Holcombe Rucker, a local playground director, started a basketball tournament in 1947 at a playground on 7th Avenue between 128th and 129th streets. In 1965, he moved the tournament to another location, at 155th Street and 8th Avenue (the former site of the Polo Grounds, which served as the home to baseball's Giants, Yankees and Mets, and football's Giants and Jets). And over the years, the league grew in prominence to the point when NBA superstars like Wilt Chamberlain and Julius Erving were coming to compete against local streetball legends like Earl "The Goat" Manigault and Pee Wee Kirkland.

Posted by: David Bunch

LSU Tiger football is getting ready to begin, and it's all the rage here in South Louisiana. But today I'm not referring to my alma mater. Tiger Woods won another PGA Tournament this weekend, his 5th of the season.

Since the World Golf Championships began in 1999, Woods has won at least
one of them every year. His now has won nine of 18, and his combined earnings of
official WGC events -- about $11.6 million -- make up more than 20 percent of
his career earnings.

Tiger Woods is simply a winner. I love to follow this guy and observe him because there is so much to learn from his championship mentality that can be applied to various aspects of my life. When he won the British Open a few weeks ago he commented on all the doubters who questioned why he had changed his swing a year or so back. "This is why, right here," said Woods as he held up the trophy. WOW! A true lesson in persistence and determination. Even when the skeptics questioned the path he chose, Woods made them all believers by focusing on his goal.

It was also said, though I haven't confirmed it, that at the British Open Tiger would practice until at least 9:00 pm each night after he played his round of golf. Keep in mind, he was in the lead! Where were the other contestants who should have been trying to hone their skills to catch up with Tiger? In the clubhouse having a good time! All while the champ was focusing on getting better.

So go out this week focused on your goal and don't let anything deter you.

As Paul says in Philippians:

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me
heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Hmm...don't believe I'll be going with 'The Crowder' look, dBunch. I don't necessarily consider it a bad look, and I might even try it out if I was in a band. Musicians and artists are supposed to look 'original' and 'creative' (i.e. different).

I wish I could do an afro, but as Bunch mentioned below, there aren't enough trees in the forest, anymore. That is why I succumbed to the Agassi look and am trying to convince Dave to do the same. And the crowd chants, "Buzz it, Bunch! Buzz it, Bunch!"

NFL
The NFL preseason is well under way, but I've learned from the past that you can't take too much stock in what happens in these games. With third and fourth string players on the field (sometimes against the opposing team's first string), it's not a clear reflection of what will happen in the regular season. For example, last year Ron Dayne ran for all kinds of yards in the preseason, so I picked him up late in our fantasy football draft. Well, he got all of about 10 carries in the regular season.

And the Saints beat the Patriots last night. Another big reason not to trust the preseason.

MLB
I am sad to report that the Astros have dropped out of the NL Wild card lead. They seem to have forgotten how to hit again. Hopefully, they didn't peak too soon and can make a run here at the end of the season.

Posted by: David Bunch

Those of you who are fans of The David Crowder Band know that the man is as eccentric as he is talented. Here he claims that the hair growth on one's chin is now officially dubbed "The Crowder", and offers advice on cultivating, grooming, and sharing "The Crowder".

What is this all about? What has everyone been talking about? ("Have you been to
growyourcrowder.com lately, it will rock your socks off!"). Take a look and
enjoy the displays of personal crowders and the stories behind them. Ladies,
while you can't (or shouldn't) grow a crowder, we hope you are stunned by the
studly men that hold these collection of hair follicles organized into a single
passion.

While I can appreciate the fact that there are various opinions among us as to the necessity, yea even the permissiveness of facial hair, I still can't help but smile at the bold social statement Crowder makes with his growth of chin hair (and the afro for that matter). Is it possible that this is something of a John the Baptist look?

Mr. McDonald and I have long since acquiesced to the fact that we have now reached the point in our lives that there is more hair growth on the face than there is on the top of the head.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Nice find, Bunch. No, not kin to that guy and to tell you the truth, I didn't even know "largest sailing ship made of ice cream sticks" was a competition.

It'll be interesting to see if that thing will actually float. Reminds me of the time I built a ship out of Legos when I was kid and christened it the USS McDonald. I brought it to the creek behind our house and set it afloat. Except it didn't float. Not to be deterred, I re-christened it the USS McDonald Submarine and proceeded to blow up all the bad guys below the surface.

Posted by: David Bunch

We like our summer water sports such as skiing, wake boarding and jet skis, but how about this? Anyone willing to take the time to build a replica Viking Ship out of ice cream sticks, not to mention sailing the thing, has my vote for Sportsman of the year. But in this case, it does seem to be for a good cause.

The ice cream sticks used to make the ship were provided by Unilever's ice cream maker OLA and by children who collected discarded sticks around the world. McDonald, whose Sea Heart Foundation (www.seaheartship.com) helps provide leisure activities for children in hospitals, hopes to sail his Viking ship across the Atlantic next year.

Hey bMax, is this guy related to you? Tell you what, I'll join the crew for the Atlantic crossing if you will.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Here's another Bush making news in the sports world.

The NCAA, in all it's wisdom, has recently decided that college athletic events need to be more politically correct, so they decided to slowly get rid of American Indian nicknames and logos. Starting in February, the name or logo cannot be displayed in postseason events and the mascot will not be allowed to perform at halftime.

There are 18 schools that this politically correct wave will affect, including Florida State. It is quite ironic, then, that the costuming of Florida State's mascot is designed by the Seminole Indian Tribe of Florida. It seems they are quite honored to be involved with and recognized by a college university. I wonder if the NCAA consulted this tribe before making their 'let-us-be-holy' decision.

GW's brother, Jeb, who is serving his second term as governor in Florida, seems to agree with me. "How politically correct can we get?" Bush asked. "The folks that make these decisions need to get out more often. You know what they ought to be worried about? The graduation rates of most college athletes. Maybe if they had some suggestions on that, universities could apply and could implement, they could be doing a service to all of us."

Jay Mohr, the stand-up comedian and columnist at si.com, weighs in on the matter here.

Apparently the rich white men whose forefathers tried (and nearly succeeded) to commit genocide against the Seminole tribe of Florida now deem Florida State's Seminole logo "hostile and offensive." Come again? The logos in question are not the red-faced, grinning Chief Wahoo of the Cleveland Indians. Nor do they use the disturbing moniker ("Redskins") that the NFL team housed in our nation's capital does. No, the "hostile and offensive" logos that the NCAA finds so troubling include such "slurs" such as "Seminoles" and "Utes" and "Fighting Illini." I ask you, what do these three team names have in common? They all are respectful nods to the people who were run off the land long before the student unions were built.

I don't know about you, but I'd be quite honored to have a college mascot named after me. The Louisiana State University Fighting Bradley Macs...has a nice ring to it, eh?

Posted by: David Bunch

Hello everyone! It's nice to be back visiting with you again at The Bench Warmer(s). First let me thank Bmax for the invitation and KDC for the "yes". And while we're at it, great job all you NAYC bloggers! For those of us who could not make the trip, you made us feel like we were a part of all the festivities. And you guys are all coming to New Orleans in 2007? IT'S ON BABY...SEE YOU THERE!

Here's a sports article of sorts that you might want to check out regarding the President and Lance Armstrong. Seems there will be a little friendly competition this weekend between the two Texans. Let's just hope Mr. Bush doesn't run over any secret service agents this time! And a special note to all of those who have been questioning President Bush's intelligence of late....sources say training wheels WILL NOT be used!

Godspeed,
dB

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Folks, I stand ashamed. It's been five days since I last posted. Hopefully, the Youth Congress bloggers kept you entertained the last few days with their fast and furious commentary! Great job to all you folks that contributed! It was definitely entertaining.

Anyway, five days is entirely too long for my wonderful readers (both of you) to go Bench Warmer-less. Oh, I could rattle off a few excuses and promise to do better, but I've decided to take the easy way out: I've recruited a co-Bench Warmer!

Don't worry/get your hopes up, I'll still be around to comment on the wonderful and wacky world of sports, but since David Bunch did such a wonderful job filling in for me last time, I asked him to help me out and not let this blog go post-less for five days again.

See, I'm attempting to get a Master's Degree in Software Engineering from Texas Tech University through a distance learning curriculum and I will be taking two classes in the fall which promise to be very time consuming (there's your excuse), so Kent allowed me to cry for help. Dave and I will be randomly posting, so for your reading convenience, I put a "Composed By" tag at the top of the post, so you'll know immediately who composed the post.

Anyway, on to a few sports notes:

• In the golf world, Phil Mickelson won his second major title at the PGA Championship in a four hole shootout today. It's easy to cheer for Phil - he's a good guy with a nice, adorable family.
• Rafael Palmeiro will tell his story "soon." I'm still waiting to hear how a very powerful steroid jumped into his body without him even knowing it.
• Terrell Owens has been sent home from the Eagles training camp for being a bad boy. What else is new? Another soap opera moment for a spoiled professional athlete.
• An elephant threw out the ceremonial first pitch in a minor league game a few days back and it was a strike! The Chicago Cubs, after losing eight straight, immediately phoned to see if they could sign the animal to a contract.
• Speaking of baseball, the Astros are atop the Wild Card standings in the National League, due in large part to Roger Clemens, who is having one of the best seasons EVER for a pitcher. Oh, and the amazing thing...Clemens is 43 years old! With his league-leading ERA currently at 1.32, Clemens really should have won every game he has pitched this year. But Houston had a problem scoring runs earlier this year for the old man.

As you will, Bro. Bunch!

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Check out this genius, who jumped from the upper deck in Yankee Stadium into the net that protects the fans behind home plate. According to police, he told friends he took the forty foot jump because he wanted to see if the net would hold him. Uh...what if it wouldn't have held?

Maybe he always wanted to be an acrobat when he grew up and figured this may be his only chance. There are a couple of big differences, though. Acrobats are trained professionals and the nets they fall into are made to catch humans. This one is made to catch a baseball.

Kids, don't do drugs.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Be sure to check out all the devotions on this week's special edition of 90&9. And if you're a closet DC Talk fan (I know you're out there), make sure you read David Bunch's devotion called "I Grow Old." Where else can you find DC Talk, J. Alfred Prufrock, and the apostle Paul mentioned in the same article?

Dave's story of his student worker days brought back some memories, because I worked in the same dungeon-esque lab for a couple of years in college for the high hourly rate of $5.15. We had quite a few characters in that lab and, of course, when Dave and I get together, we must reminisce and act out a few stories, much to the dismay of our womenfolk.

I didn't quite share the same enthusiasm for DC Talk as Dave, which made for some animated discussions about KMax and his singing voice (still sounds like a sheep to me), but it was all in good fun. I'll admit, though, that everyone should hear lyrics like, "get busy like a schoolboy making an 'A', cause time my friend is tickin' away!"

And now for a poll: KMax - Singing Sheep or Master of Rapid Vibrato?

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Here's an interesting thought from Mark Bechtel in his blog on si.com. He talks about the irony that Jose Canseco may just turn out to be the most credible source in the steroid scandals. When his book came out, he accused many respected players of taking steroids and not many people took him seriously. Turns out that Canseco may know what he's talking about after all.

One of the more delicious ironies of this affair is that the one guy who took a stand in front of Congress, the one guy who put his reputation on the line, the one guy who denied anything in a compelling manner, has lost his credibility. At the same time, the guy who admitted being a cheater and the guy who was reviled for it has become more and more credible every day. Jose Canseco says he did steroids when he was a teammate of Palmeiro's in Texas. Palmeiro says it's not true. Who are you going to believe? A guy who tells the truth about what is, admittedly, unsavory behavior, or a guy who might have lied to a Congressional committee? Canseco's looking more and more like the most believable guy on that panel. It's like Peter Falk's line to Alan Arkin after they land in the fictional country of Tijada in The In-Laws: "They're all crooks down here. At least this one don't make any bones about it."

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

Everyone knows elephants aren't the fleetest afoot, so I was quite surprised to find that someone came up with the idea of using them in polo matches. There is an actual "World Elephant Polo Association." Probably not something you can sign up for at your local city park.

Not surprisingly, the co-founders of the Association came up with the idea in a bar. I can just imagine how that conversation went.

Here's a little more information on Elephant Polo, if any of you are interested in trying it out.

Elephant polo was first played in India around the turn of the 20th century by members of the British aristocracy. The World Elephant Polo Association is the first and paramount organization in modern times to host the sport. The first games were played with a soccer ball, but after finding that the elephants like to smash the balls, the soccer ball was replaced with a standard polo ball. The sticks are made of bamboo and have a standard polo mallet on the end. The length of the stick depends on the size of the elephant - anywhere from 6 to 9 feet.

The rules of the game are similar to horse polo, but the pitch is 3/4 length (because of the slower speed of the elephants) and there are some necessary additions - for instance, it is a penalty for an elephant to lie down in front of the goal line. Players are secured in rope harnesses, with a rope across their thighs and rope stirrups. The game will stop if a player's harness becomes too loose and there is a danger of the player falling off. Players have fallen off elephants only a few times in WEPA's 20 year history.

The primary difference between horse and elephant polo, besides the substitution of an elephant for a horse, is that the elephants are "driven" by their trainers, called "mahouts." The mahouts have generally worked with the elephant for many years and the elephants respond quickly to the mahouts signals and commands. The mahouts communicates with the elephant with verbal commands and by applying pressure to the back of the elephant's ears with their feet. The player's responsibility is to let the mahout know where to go, how fast, when to stop, etc. Most of the mahouts and all of the elephants only understand Nepali, so the communication is difficult at times. The professional players tend to learn some basics of the Nepali language to help with the communication on the pitch.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

The UPCI's North American Youth Congress happens to be this week, August 10th-12th, and for those of you who can't make it (includes me), 90&9 will be bringing it to you! Some of our staff and friends will be blogging live from Columbus, Ohio, starting tomorrow. They will be set up on our monthly blogger's site, so be sure to check it out.

Denelle, our August blogger, has been so kind to sit out a week so we can bring this live reporting event to you. All I gotta say is that the Youth Congress bunch better be good, because I was enjoying what Denelle had to say.

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

The Results of Rafael Palmeiro's steroid test were leaked to a member of the media, even though such leakage is prohibited. It's not good news for Palmeiro fans, either. Allegedly, he tested positive for the steroid stanozolol and it ain't in your average, everyday vitamins! From espn.com:

Stanozolol, known by the brand name Winstrol, is most notably linked to the Olympic sprinter Ben Johnson of Canada, who was stripped of his 100-meter gold medal in 1988. It is not available in over-the-counter supplements and is known as a powerful strength-builder, casting doubt on Palmeiro's claims that he ingested the drug unwittingly.

And, uh, Mr. Palmeiro? Congress would like to have a word with you. Something about "never used steroids" and some oath you took.

"The Committee is seeking the results of the drug tests, the date of the tests, and other relevant information," the statement said. "He has agreed to authorize the release of all relevant documents to the Committee, which will help us fully understand the facts of the situation. Once we review the documents, we will determine our next step."

In confirming that he would cooperate with the committee, Palmeiro said that if it has any additional questions, "I am ready and willing to answer each and every one of them."

Posted by: Bradley McDonald

We've got a new blogger up and running over at A Month In My Life. Say 'hello' to Denelle Burns, a twenty-something single female who just moved from LA to New York. Start spreading the news...

I have to admit I'm a little envious of anyone living in NY. I've been infatuated with the place ever since my first trip there. There's so much to explore! I think I would have enough of the crowdedness after about three months, though.

Be sure to go cheer on Wendy, over at Just a Little Bit Odd, as she tries to Date Lance (no, not Armstrong).

Posted by: Bradley McDonald